Hi all, I am considering an open marriage as a way to save my marriage. I love my husband but have recently realized I'm either bisexual but much more attracted to women or gay. I wanted to know how it works if anyone knows. It would be a way for me to meet my needs but worried the strong feelings/firework chemistry I've had with one women only come with an emotional connection. I've kissed a few other women out at night drunk but it wasnt nearly the same so wondering if an open relationship will actually work to save my marriage? Just going off limited experience with women. I cant get an emotional attatchment as thats not fair to my husband so it would be physical only (no relationships). If this wont work then I think we have to divorce Any thoughts?
If you really want to do this, try online dating to find someone who is into the same thing. It's also easier to sleep with "curious" straight women since they have no romantic attachment for other women, thus less drama (or even hetero-romantic oriented bisexual women). In many cases, though it does not work....sometimes we need what our opposite sex partner just can't give us. It's worth a try, but just keep it mind it might not fix the issues you're having.
IMHO, I can't see an open marriage working without some eventual regrets. Maybe you two can try new things?? Have you discussed options with your husband?
It all has to be openly communicated and even ground rules set forth or it seems destined for failure for sure at some point .
Have you discussed this with your husband? Would he agree to it if you decided you wanted to do this? From all that I have read, I read most that communication, setting boundaries and checking in (maybe resetting boundaries or checking to see what's still okay or new) is very important to keep open relationships going.
Thanks for posting and I am excited to hear what others have experienced. I thought about this a lot as a way to be out but still be with my wife, whom I love. However, my main concern is that I am primarily gay. I would want to be with a man that I could have not only a sexual relationship (although that is SO important) but would also want to be with him romantically and emotionally. I could see myself really wanting to give that gay relationship the time it would need to flourish. This seems to be the thing that is missing from my life. The short of it is...I think I would fall for a guy and I am not sure that my straight marriage could handle that. But I am sure there are some success stories out there.
Hey. I am in a "semi open" marriage. I have gay "friends" that I am intimate with. We've only been at this for about 6 months so I am far from an expert. But, I think there are a number of important things to do. 1. COMMUNICATION. There, really, can be no misunderstanding about what is going on in each of your lives. 2. Common goal. In our case, we decided to set priorities and maintaining the marriage was the top priority. So, anything, or anyone, that threatens this is off limits. 3. Rules. Set some as far as what is acceptable behavior. What type of sex, where, how much you spend on dating. 4. Work...You will be spending more time with others outside your marriage. Marriage is a lot of work to maintain. So, you have to put in overtime to be sure your spouse is taken care off. 5. Romance. Date your spouse. Your relationship needs a spark or it will become way less exciting than the same sex prospects you are pursuing. 6. Have fun. If this isn't about feeling better about yourself, then why do it?
