There's a girl I've liked since we were kids and my family said it was just a phase or I'd grow out of it or it was just me being happy being her friend, she practically lives at my house and sleeps in my room a lot. She has a boyfriend and I don't know what to do it I just give up or keep trying I can't think anymore. I want to officially come out to my family and her but I don't have the guts to whenever I go to tell them I start shaking... their a strict Christian family and as a kid I always heard them talk badly about gays and trans people... I feel like if I did come out everything would just get worse then it is....please help..
There are a number of factors in this scenario that concern me... namely your age and the fact that she has a boyfriend. Let's start with age. How old are you? If you're still a teen (which I'm assuming) you need to be very careful. You live with a "Strict Christian family," and coming out to them could lead to severe problems. They could kick you out, disown you, make your life at home a living hell. I'm not saying this to scare you, I'm saying this because it happens to a lot of lgbt youth. Coming out to a religious family that have a certain disdain for lgbt people can have severe repercussions so I would either keep it a secret or see if they have changed their perspective. Maybe bring up an lgbt related news article or topic for discussion, talk about a celebrity you admire that is part of the community; anything to gauge their judgement and to passively bring up the subject. As for your friend? Yeah... don't interfere. I know it may seem harsh and that you like her a lot but as long as she's in a relationship she is off limits. Confessing your feelings for her now could ruin your friendship completely. No joke. It's unhealthy to bottle up your feelings/emotions and your identity but sometimes we have to for the sake of safety. In your situation I would keep it on the down low until your family shows some inclination of acceptance, if they ask you if you're gay/bi/whatever or if you move out and have your own safe place. To cope with the isolation and your fears seek solace in sites likes this, build up a community of like minded Friends and other people in your situation and make sure you have a support system to fall back on if things go awry. Hope everything turns out okay! x
Thank you Rainbows. Like QuestioningMe17, I am bi and live in a Strict Christian home with family members who would not accept me for who I am. I know my age says I'm 27 but I'm actually 16(didn't know if site would block me) and I need some help on coming out. I have some friends who I think will accept me for who I am and I'm almost ready to talk to them. If there i anymore advice you can give, it will be greatly appreciated. Thank you
