As some of you may know, I've been coming out as bisexual to my family for about 7 months now. I told my younger brother and sister first then I told my mum about 2 weeks ago. I planned on telling my older brother and dad in the next few days...until my mum told everyone today :icon_sad: It started this morning with songs about gay people being played really loud, then a couple of hours later my mum sat me down along with my sister to ask how I knew I was bisexual. Neither of them were very happy by this point and I knew that if I said anything, it would only make things worse. When my dad and older brother got back minutes later, she asked them if I told them. My older brother didn't say anything but my dad said stuff like she didn't tell me but if she did, I have carted her off to the GP. And things like he doesn't believe in that kinda stuff. My dad and sister then started talking about how they thought I was weird and there was just a terrible atmosphere so I went to find out what my older brother thought. We had a really long conversation and he said he wanted to support my decision and that it didn't change anything for him. Now I've heard variations of this from my younger brother and mum so I'm not sure I can believe that. The whole thing has gone on the entire day and all I can hear is how strange I am. I asked my younger brother how he really felt after relaying the rest of the family's reaction and he said he's with them on it and he doesn't want to talk to me anymore. I feel betrayed by him in particular because I told him if he had an issue that he should speak to me but he was talking to my sister all along. And the rest of my family have made it clear they want nothing to do with me. They confirmed what I suspected all along really. I don't feel safe in that atmosphere because I know that their opinion won't change so the only thing I can do is move out.
OMG!!! That's appalling. I know some family members take a while to come round but the way they have behaved and made you feel is just horrible. And as for your dad I can't believe he said that. I hope you can move out soon so you can feel safe.
Sorry to hear that. Sounds like your younger brother just doesn't want to anger your dad. Not sure what your mothers deal is... Maybe she was originaly okay with it, then heard some people talk about it in a bad way and changed her mind.. Either way how she did it is sneaky and sounds more like what a nasty sneaky teenager might do in highschool to bully another kid in order to feel better about their own ego. And your father... how small minded and arrogant can one person be? It's not like we are in the 50s and he's simply never been exposed to other opinions and information on the subject? My parents aren't much different which is why I've never told them anything but it still boggles my mind how smallminded and nasty people can be... I hope you can move out and gather nice and warm people around yourself soon. You deserve so much more then this. Take care!
Sorry to hear about this. You don't deserve to be treated this way by you own family, and your parents' reaction was especially out of order. They should have some respect for you for your bravery to come out to them in the first place. Most of my family would certainly react in a similar if I were to come out to them, that's why I am keeping it to myself for now. With time your parents will accept who you are, you are their daughter after all. You need to make them understand that this is your way of living and that nothing has changed between you and them. I agree with the other people in this thread. I hope that you can find a place where you can feel safe and comfortable with who you are, and that everything works out well for you. You deserve better than this.
I don't know what to do because I don't have anywhere I could stay to give them some space, they are asking questions like how do I know I'm bi but I know they don't want to hear the answer and I'm trying to talk about the situation and that just ends into a fight. My family are really conservative but I thought it would be different somehow Even my older brother is being called weird because he was on my side! The worst thing would be for him to get similar treatment for something I did. I even told them that I wanted to move out and they asked why would I want to do that but they've still continued to create a horrible atmosphere I don't know how things are going to be resolved
I think you should let your parents absorb this a bit. Their reaction was inappropriate, but it's still a lot for them to take in. When they ask you and you don't want to talk about your sexuality then you have the right to refuse, this is your life! Let them cool down and re-approach the issue when all the tension has died down. Is there someone in your family who is more liberal and could take you in possibly? You could try contacting an LGBT support group in your area. They have various services that can give you help and advice, as well as meeting other people in a similar situation. You don't deserve this treatment, take care. (*hug*)
This comes to mind https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/when-did-you-realize-you-were-straight-jvinc/
Thanks for the advice everyone. RedTrekkie95 thankfully things have settled down for now. I'll just keep a low profile because I think talking will make things worse. All my other family members pretty much think the same way but I'm waiting to go to a local LGBT group soon. And Luka99 I actually thought the same thing yesterday :lol: I would show it to my family but I'm sure they wouldn't find it funny!!
So my brother came out as gay, and didn't give a damn what anyone of us thought in the family, and I think that was that and nobody bothered him because of it... his inner peace does not depend on anyone's opinion about his identity. He could actually make a great life coach. ---------- Post added 10th Apr 2017 at 12:45 PM ---------- Sounds like you chose a difficult soul path like all old souls.... don't despair, you are here to teach people tolerance of what they don't understand.
