So, since I'm new and no one knows me, I'll start this out by saying that I often - very often - feel like a guy inside, and I always have. However, as I grew into my body, I started appreciating being female, to a certain extent, enough so that I no longer hated my body. But mostly I daydream of being a guy. Not that I'll do anything about it. I'm married with three kids. So... I've always assumed that I'm bisexual, with a lean towards women. This is because I do find some men attractive, and I like watching hetero porn. However, I don't know why it took me so long to assign any meaning to my fantasies, but it dawned on me a little while ago that every time I'm getting off on hetero porn, I'm ALWAYS imagining myself in the guy's role. And it dawned on me: I have SERIOUS penis envy. And, basically, even if my fantasies have a guy in them, I'm the guy, and I always want my hands on a woman's body. I like guys because I want to be the guy, if that makes sense... So, what are my fantasies? Bi? Straight? Lesbian? I'm so confused. I don't know if I'm actually bisexual, or if I'm 100% gay...or would I be straight, because I'm a guy inside?
It's hard to say and only you can know for sure. Can you imagine having sex with another guy if you had a male body? If you can that would probably make you bi. For gender issues, doing some research into gender dysphoria and finding out if that sounds like you might help.
Well. for me I fantasize being the one on the receiving end. Then actually be the one giving. When I had a relationship with a woman. It felt like nothing really. I loved her but just couldn't get into it. Found the VJ disgusting and wonder how guys like it. When I see a penis I get hot. Especially when they enjoy it. Though I have trouble with the kissing end and feel bad about it at times. Also find that I'm very picky when it comes to males looks. Most guys turn me off. the ones that turn me on more are caring and hard working and funny. I dont have much experience with relationships so I still can't say for sure. But I would say put some thought into it. maybe its just a fantasy?
I have little to no experience with relationships so I don't think I'll be much help giving advise, although I find myself in a similar situation, subtract the married and kids part. If you imagine yourself in the guy role, does that mean you prefer a female partner over a male partner? Now if you stay in role, would you still feel the same way about being with a guy? I don't have the answer to your questions but only more questions that I have that might be of help as a way of exploring your feelings. Sorry if it's not helpful. Best of luck with figuring everything out!
All I can say is that I can relate (sort of). I am I guy, and I occasionally fantasize that I am the woman in a sexual situation. Whereas most guys grab or rub their penises during times of arousal (while not actually masturbating), I, almost instinctively, rub my fingers in the space underneath my testicles, or between my testicles and anus, as if I have a vagina.
Some good questions in there! Yes, I definitely fantasize occasionally as topping another guy. (I might have problems submitting in any aspect of my life.) So, still bisexual, at least as far as having sex goes. When it comes to life partners, if I'd made some different choices earlier in my life (like not letting my religious mother control me), I'm very sure I would have been with a woman. Gender dysphoria is nothing new to me. I often dressed as a boy in my youth when I could get away with it, and in those times I felt freer than at any other time in my life. When someone mistakes me as a guy because my hair is so short, I get a thrill of excitement, like they saw me for the real me. Just last week, while my husband was at work, I transformed my face with makeup into a guy, put on his clothes, and just...walked around. I'm sure I'll never feel normal, but I have too much involved in my life to do anything permanent about it now.
