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Straight man / lesbian friendships in the media.

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Canterpiece, Mar 18, 2017.

  1. Canterpiece

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    I think it's fair to say that in the media, the idea of straight women/ gay men friendships have been heavily explored, joked about, and focused on. But with straight men and lesbians... I can't think of any shows or films that feature a close friendship between a lesbian and a straight man. Usually what is more common is that there is a straight tomboyish character who often gets mistaken for a lesbian, some hilarity ensues, and she goes through some makeover, finally gets noticed by her male friends (because she was too much "one of the guys" before to get noticed) only for one of them to tell her she was perfect anyway.

    It can be difficult to think of any exclusively gay female characters that are main, or even a close supportive characters in a TV show. I can't think of a main character who is a lesbian in a TV show, at least not one that didn't die within a few weeks of the series and/ or realised they liked men.

    Faking it came quite close, although their main character turned out to be bisexual leaning gay rather than a lesbian, and the one character who actually was a lesbian was antagonised.

    When you search the internet about friendships between straight men and lesbians, the results aren't exactly inspiring. The first few things that come up are about porn, how such friendships are doomed to fail, what straight men don't get about lesbians, and "advice" articles aimed at straight men on how to woo/ impress a lesbian so much that they "become" bisexual. :rolle:

    In contrast, when you search about friendships between straight women and gay men, the stuff that comes up is less negative. When a man is friends with a lesbian, people assume he hangs out with lesbians because he can't get any (look at the term "lesbro" to see what I mean) but such views are seemingly not as reflected when a woman is friends with a gay man.

    Can you think of any shows/film/media that have a close friendship between a straight man and a lesbian in? Do you think there should be more focus on these kind of friendships in the media? In general, what are your thoughts? :eusa_thin
     
    #1 Canterpiece, Mar 18, 2017
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2017
  2. Godless

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  3. AuroraBorealis

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    I honestly can't...I think there's a stereotype that lesbians hate men and then there's a stereotype that all men just "don't get lesbians" and act like "she just hasn't met the right guy" Of course there are always some people who fit the stereotype, I have met men like that, but I'm also friends with multiple straight guys who are great people.

    In short, I don't think the media focuses on these friendships because stereotypes will not "allow" them to.
     
  4. Blackrainbow

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    There's a British show called Lip Service, that if I recall had a fairly central friendship between a lesbian and a straight guy. To the extent that when I first watched it, (as a rather clueless thirteen year old) I assumed they were a couple.

    I don't mind these friendships in media, since they do debunk the whole 'lesbians hate men' thing, though I think depending on how they're written, they can run the risk of becoming a romantic relationship rather than a friendship, or at least easily perceived that way by casual viewers. If you've ever seen the US version of Skins, there's a truly painful instance of a lesbian making an 'exception' for the male main character. (When they could have just as easily made her bisexual instead.)

    I don't think media tends to focus on these friendships, though I'd say it focuses on lesbian/straight woman friendships even less. In general, I'd say lesbians (and bisexuals) are still pretty underrepresented in media, and when they do feature their main relationships tend to be romantic, rather than platonic.
     
  5. dvxqnc

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    Because gay men are obviously fun divas who love to shop with their female friends and drink wine! Every gay man needs a female best friend!!!111

    In all seriousness though I think that lesbians are misrepresented in the media in general, and that's why straight male/lesbian friendships are less prominent.
     
  6. Non binary kid

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    True that!
     
  7. tickabox

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    Grey's Anatomy - Richard and Arizona probably helped by him being just about old enough to be her dad.
     
  8. Creativemind

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    I can't think of any off the top of my head. Part of it is due to stereotypes; lesbians are consider man haters and straight men are considered perverts that was to "change" their lesbian friends.

    Even in real life, it's hard for me to find a positive example.