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Two Years Ago Today

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by quebec, Feb 17, 2017.

  1. quebec

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    Today I am emotionally exhausted, but in a good way. Two years ago today was the first time in my life that the words "I am gay" were spoken to another person. It was agony and fear, shame and terror, but I knew that the time had come. I had to do it and the right person was there with me. He accepted me, hugged me and listened to me try to talk through tears that would not stop. On that day I became free...it is my birthday in a way. I will never forget the release, the joy and the freedom that I felt that day. I hope for everyone who reads this, who is still hiding, that you too will be able to have the joy and freedom that I had on that day....David
     
  2. Weston

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    "When you finally come out, there's a pain that stops, and you know it will never hurt like that again, no matter how much you lose or how bad you die." Paul Monette, Becoming a Man
     
  3. looking for me

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    truely a relief and freeing of the soul. congrats
     
  4. mnguy

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    Congratulations on two years being out!! How has your life changed since then? Any advice on what went well or things not to do after coming out?
     
  5. quebec

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    mngy...thanks for the encouragement! How has my life changed? Well...you first have to understand that, at least for now, I am not out to very many people. I am out to my wife..that was tough, but we do love each other (hard to figure that one out!) and are going to stay together (married 38 years). I am also out to my therapist and 5-6 other close friends. I live in a small town and am very well known. I am very active in church..board of Deacons, teacher, musician, etc. So coming out totally to the world is probably not going to happen. So my life has changed and changed a lot, but those changes are mostly within me. I hid in the closet for over 55 years (I am 66) so there are a lot of things that I have to unlearn and many, many others that I have to learn. Anyway...having almost all the changes be in me is actually really good right now. It's giving me the time to learn who I am, who the new-me really is! As far as what to do/not to do after coming out...I'm certainly not an expert, but I do have one really big suggestion: Don't feel like you have to come out to every person you know or every person that you meet. Not everyone needs to know, not everyone has the right to know. You are the one who makes the decision as to who you will tell. Be selective. Be sure that those who you tell are trustworthy. Unless you specifically tell someone that they can share what you have told them, they should let you do the "telling"...let you make the decision whether you want someone to know or not....David
     
  6. Adz6

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    Congratulations on your anniversary,