Once you finally had gay sex, how did it feel to you looking back at straight sex? I realise this may not apply to those who identify as bi, but please share your feelings, no matter your identity. I can't articulate how different the two feel to me. The desire, the need, the naturalness, the vulnerability and the tenderness and power behind sex with a woman for me is just so incredible, real, right, fulfilling, amazing. With men, it seems looking back that it was somehow.... like playing at sex, or mechanical.... not even sure how to describe it. I had some fun with men, sex was often playful and loving, comfortable and good in its own way. But ... I'm just so gay. And I'm so glad I'm not pretending anymore. Thoughts? experiences?
i'll let you know when i actually find a guy to be with........ i have no idea when/if that might be however..... haha:rolle:
The only experience I've had since coming out, has been a hookup. I was drinking, and it just seemed like a fine idea at the time. I felt nothing from it really, which I actually perceive as a good thing in this case. For so many years, I was afraid that if I ever did anything with a guy, that I would have all these feelings of guilt and shame. Yet, I felt none of those. I know that didn't really answer any question, it is just something (kinda) related that I found interesting.
I've recently had by far the best sex I ever had in my life, with a woman. I told her now I don't even consider sex that I had with guys sex. It seems like some weird annoying stuff I had to do that involves penises. I almost find the thought of it disgusting now. Looking back, the only thing I found enjoyable about sex with guys was the thought that they found me attractive, that they couldn't control themselves with me because they found me so irresistible. I always felt like that's how most straight women view sex (and, on some level, I still do), which I always felt I was basically straight (though had sexual fantasies about women). Do straight women enjoy sex with guys in other ways?
I never actually had sex with a woman, but I spent all of my teen years thinking I was straight. The difference between masturbating while thinking about women vs while thinking about men? It's a bit like eating lukewarm plain mashed potatoes for five years...and then suddenly being set loose in a great all-you-can-eat buffet. Lex
Looking back on it I now know that for me, sex with a lady was always an act of giving. I didn't take pleasure from the physical side of it but from making the other person happy. When I was married I eventually began avoiding sex by feigning sleep or pretending to feel unwell although I would still masturbate regularly. Sex with a member of the same sex however is a shared experience and just wonderful. I may be biased as I have only had full sex a couple of times since I became me again so i may not be the best judge. However I did have a lot of sex with men from age 17 to around 22 when the event which made me decide to live a straight life happened so i do have experience and don't expect the feelings to change.
From a physical standpoint, I like both. However when I have sex with my wife, I'm making love. When I have sex with a guy, I'm having sex. I've never felt the emotional connection with a guy regardless of how passionate the sex was.
It was like just kinda going through the moitions and pretending you're okay with it and it's normal for girls to feel 'unsatisfied' with what the guys do. Honestly, it would take so much mental power to get myself to finish. But then, I had sex with a woman and I still had some nervousness so finishing took a little bit longer but when I was giving oral to the woman-I honestly never felt so more turned on than I ever had been. Just feels right like putting on a perfect pair of sneakers.
Sex with women wasn't awful per se, but something always felt "off." You mentioned the word mechanical. On the one hand, my junk was getting stimulated, the touch and so forth felt good, but it never felt "right."
With women I was just trying to get off. If they asked me to go down on them it was work. I liked doggie style but I realize I was imagining something else Here is big difference for me: I can give a blow job and feel totally satisfied without me having to cum. With guys I want to please them, i get this rush through my body when i give a bj and when I get f*cked. I am really not that interested in 'cumming' anymore. The first time I got f*cked by a guy it hurt but its hard to explain, I didn't orgasm or feel any joy but when we were done I felt more satisfied and alive than i ever had being with a woman. It just made me realize just how gay I am
There are also many men who were either not aware of their gay orientation or were supressing it, who had problems with premature ejaculation while trying to have intercourse with women. This was also my experience. What about yours?
Yes. It is possible to 'walk' in a pair that doesn't fit and you can be wearing the wrong pair your whole life.. but don't realize it was wrong until you put on the right pair.
I really appreciate you all sharing your experiences. I've not intentionally abandoned this thread, I'm just taking in everything being shared on here. I've been feeling so blown away by how meaningful, fulfilling and overpowering gay sex is for me. I'm just so glad I'm finally living fully.
