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Need Advice about my gender

Discussion in 'The Welcome Lounge' started by FallenStar, Jan 19, 2017.

  1. FallenStar

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    I'll start by saying I apologize if this is not the place to post this, I wasn't exactly sure where to go, I am totally new here and just need some advice from some people who may know better.

    Ever since I was a teenager I have had on and off gender dysphoria. Generally I would feel like a perfectly fine man, but sometimes I would feel like I'd make a better girl. For a long time it felt like a sexual thing more than an actual desire to transition, usually going away if I explored it through role-play or something. But over the last year or so, it has, at times, become pretty intense. More than ever in my past I have found myself genuinely wishing I was a girl, but then still, other times I feel totally fine as the gender I am. I am really confused and can't figure out if I am trans or not. Sometimes I am dead certain I want to be a woman, but then I think about the difficulties involved in transitioning and losing the body I have now and I can't imagine it.

    I don't mean to come across as fickle, or flippant, I just need some advice from some people who may know more about this, or may have experienced this themselves. Is there a way for me to tell if I am trans or not, or if it is just a fascination with cross-gender play?
     
  2. rebelAssassin

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    Cross-gender play, as far as I know, doesn't involve gender dysphoria. What you've described sounds a lot like either genderfluid or genderqueer. Have you looked into these at all?
     
  3. FallenStar

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    Yes some. But it goes beyond just playing. There are times where I really feel like I should be a girl, in everyday life, it's just that cross-gender play sometimes alleviates the feelings. But even sometimes the cross-gender play makes it worse I don't know. Sometimes I feel right as who I am, sometimes I don't. I don't really know how else to explain it.
     
  4. rebelAssassin

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    Might I suggest making a similar post in the Gender Identity and Expression forum? You should get a wider response there. I have gone through the same feelings, though less intense. At first I was convinced I was genderfluid; however, as I began looking a littler deeper, I began questioning again. This isn't about me, though. This is about you.

    If you can get therapy or counseling, I would recommend it. A professional may be able to help you, though only you can know for sure. Talking to people on here will help greatly, too. EC is full of kind, supportive people, many of whom have been where you are. Doing some more research should make things clearer. While it seems odd to give advice to someone older than myself, that's what I have to say. I truly hope it helps, and I wish you the best of luck on this journey