So, I met this girl about a year ago when I moved to a private school. About a quarter through last year, she came out to me as pansexual, and I did the same. I have developed a quite a crush on her since then. We got really, really close at a certain point last year (holding hands, "I love you"s, etc), but a friend of hers intervened and accused me of this crush. In the heat of the moment, I lied (she was there, too) that I just thought of her as a friend and nothing more. I stopped talking that much with her because I didn't know if she liked me back or if she would be freaked out by my crush. She invited me to go with her and a couple of other friends to an LGBT+ festival last summer, but I politely declined. This year, we are starting to get close again, but I don't quite know if she feels the same way I do, as she has stated that she has zero attraction to anyone at our school. It really hurts because I love her, and at times she treats me like I don't matter. But at times it seems like she feels the same way. Should I just give up on this crush? What should I do??
Talking to her I think would be the best course of action. I mean, you're never gonna know if you don't talk to her about it. And giving up on it will just be...reeeeally slow and painful.
Thanks for the advice , although I'm not sure I would be able to gather the nerve to do that. I plan to tell her at the end of the year so that if she doesn't feel the same way, I won't have to see her again (I would be very embarrassed).
I've been there and trust me, you'll get over that I've had both people confessing their crush to me and me telling others that I liked them, and yeah the first time seeing someone again was a bit awkward but in the end it all turned out fine. Getting rejected sucks, but it's not the end of the world. Chances are, even if she doesn't have the same feelings, she will feel flattered that you like her that much
Thank you. That would be my first course of action if I just wasn't so shy and easily flustered. My crush actually recently posted on social media that she had feelings for someone (I don't know if it's me or not). I am quite sure she was referring to me though because I had just texted her that I liked someone. I was overjoyed when I saw the post, but the next day she seemed to avoid me and talk rudely to me when we came in contact. We still text, but she's been kinda hurtful to me since. It hurts me so much because I just don't know what I'm supposed to do, and it feels like she hates me, and I don't know why.
From what you've said it sounds like she's confused too... she might be behaving strangely because she's a little hurt from what happened with the friend, especially if she was perhaps developing feelings for you and then it appeared that you only thought of her as a friend. Although even if she's confused it's not exactly fair of her to be cold to you one minute and kind the next, since that can be a serious strain on a friendship. Honestly, I think the best way of dealing with it is to talk to her, and be honest. The worst that can happen is that she rejects you which would suck, but if she doesn't like you in that way and she's hurting you then maybe distancing yourself would be the best thing ( obviously I don't know her personally, but from what you said you sound upset) . The other outcome is that she says she likes you too, which would be great! Or she says she isn't sure how she feels, but even then at least you've gained some clarity as to why she's acting up and you could eventually work it out. I hope I helped, feel free to talk anytime
