So i've been questioning my sexuality for a while now. At this stage, i identify as bisexual but it's taken me a while to accept that. My family is homophobic and very ignorant, I know that I will never be able to come out to them (unless I'm ok with being disowned). The only time I feel ashamed about my sexuality is when i'm around my family but this is making me feel confused. I want to come out. I've never said it out loud before. I'm 18 and at college. I have a group of friends and they are all accepting, as far as I know. However, only one of them I am close to, the others I have only known since September but I feel like I want to say something now, before the moment passes. I have feelings for one of the girls in the group (I'll call her Blue). Blue apparently came out as gay to our group last week and this has made me feel more confident in coming out to them. I want to come out because i'm tired of not having anyone to talk to about this... and also because I have all of these feelings which are all heightened at the moment because i'm having to hide them. I want to be able to just accept that they're there, rather than constantly thinking about them and how they would affect my life if people knew. Also, there's nothing about me that screams bi/queer but I want Blue to know that I'm not straight, just in case I have a chance with her. So I think I'm ready to come out to my friends (never my family) but I have no idea how to. Do i wait for the conversation to be focused on LGBT (but this could take a while)? Do i just say "oh, by the way guys, i'm bi"? would love some advice please
Something like "Oh, by the way, I don't know if you guys know this or not but, I am bi. You know just in case you want to hook me up on a blind date or something crazy like that." works pretty well. You might actually get that blind date but, hey, it will be fun.
Or some LGBT-themed bracelet/necklace/clothing? That would be a good way to hint to Blue specifically. I was going to say well it sounds like Blue might be a first person to confide in, and then ask for advice. There's nothing that flatters people more than being asked "What do you think I should do?" But if you sort of have her in your eye too it might be hard to balance the just-asking attitude with the secretly-hoping one. If she asks, based on my earlier hint about LGBT regalia, then you can still ask her "What do you think?" Otherwise you do have to think about how to come out to the group in general, so that Blue realizes you are fair game. That's more of a challenge. But a girl who can write a good cogent, literate summary like yours probably also knows better than us how to proceed. But good luck, and keep us posted! We so love to hear good outcomes.
