Okay, I'm going to be a fool and do this while....slightly?...intoxicated. I registered a few days ago completely sober, though I've been lurking for a couple years on and off. I'm 36 years old and have been gay since before I understood what all these feelings meant. But a bit of social pressure, then a lifetime of hardcore puritanical christian thinking led me to try to bury my true self until I simply couldn't bear the cognitive dissonance any longer and gave up the bullshit. But I find myself lost, still. I completely isolated myself through the years of struggle, desperate to protect my "deep dark secret", and now I don't know what to do. I hate being alone, but I don't know how to be any different? Anyway, I'll leave it there for now. I have read others similar in age post things that resonated with me, and I feel I should contribute, too. Many beautiful souls have given great comfort here, even to lurkers like me And perhaps someday I will be able to help another. Anywho... :smilewave
Welcome to EC Sorry to hear about some of your struggles, but this site is pretty good so I'm sure you'll find some answers/help on here