I find this so difficult especially since coming to terms with everything. I was just talking to my stepmom and brother about gender identity and sexuality and my stepmom wanted an example since she was trying to learn and asked me what my gender is. I'm not ready to come out yet so I said I'm a girl and it just was really weird since it's not something I every have to say out loud. Then to help her learn I said that means I'm cisgender which led her on a rant about how she doesn't want to learn of everything is going to be so complicated and how instead of terms like cisgender can't we just say I identify as a girl and was born a girl. I basically am starting to consider not coming out since every time we talk about gender in my house it ends in either an arguement about what is and isn't a gender and rants like this.
Not coming out is definitely an option when you fear for your safety, both emotional and physical, in your household. It's a really crappy option, but it is. Please just know that you are no less male just because you have to pretend you're a woman in your home. However, if the dysphoria this causes proves to be too much of a burden on you, it's important that you know that your health is the most important factor in all of this and that if your dysphoria gets to that point, I recommend seeing a councilor or therapist. Best of luck to you, I hope it works out!
That is unfortunate, but many of us have to do the same thing. I have found myself straight up lying to people when I do something inherently feminine without thinking about it, they give me "the look", and I shrug it off and say, "It's okay, I'm comfortable with my masculinity." Nothing could be further from the truth. The difference is, I have been lying for much longer. It just gets harder to do.
