I didn't really know who to ask and then I found this website so hi I guess. I'm a 13yr old bisexual female and I'm really confused. Ever since i was able to choose my own clothes and what I looked like, what I played with I've always been a tomboy. When I was younger I thought that if I was male I'd fit in with the other boys. All the girls were really feminine and I wasn't like them. As I got older i realised that I'm female and thats just who I am but that thought of being male was still there. When I got to about 11 I thought that I could try fit in more and tried to be more feminine. When I started high school (12yrs old) I got bullied because I hadn't developed breasts. All the other girls had them and I was still flat chested. When I was younger I always told my mum that I didn't want breasts but the desire to fit in won and I was desperate. Now I'm 13 I realise that I only wanted them because I thought the bullying would stop if I was like the other girls. I know I'm female and sometimes I feel feminine although I've always avoided dresses and skirts. I don't think I'm transgender because I do feel feminine at times it's just I'm starting to think I'd feel more comfortable in my own skin that way. Am I genderfluid or am I just growing up? CobraKiy3
Gender-fluid people feel male sometimes and female at others. What you describe seems more like a tomboy to me, although that assessment isn't worth much given the circumstances. Only you know your thoughts so you're the only one that can answer the question of who you are. But I do know several women (gay and straight) who present very masculine, have male clothes in their wardrobe, one wears men's boxer briefs every day. My point is unless you feel male or like you should be male, your not trans. And it's not something you need to answer tomorrow, you're going to grow and change alot in the next decade or so and all you really need to worry about is being yourself. Express yourself, do what feels right even if it's outside of your comfort zone and you will figure out who you are.
Being feminine doesn't make you a woman. There are feminine trans men, and masculine cis women. What's more important is deciding whether or not you feel physical or social dysphoria and whether feeling male feels right.
Thanks for the help. I've always dismissed the feeling of wanting to be a boy sometimes because I was born female. I thought that it was just who I had to be. Not that long ago I watched a documentary about a trans person and that was when I started to think more about it and if what I'm feeling is an actual thing. Earlier on I wanted to see what I'd look like as a boy and something just clicked. I'm not sure it, just felt like me. I'm not sure what it is but I have a dislike for my body and it all went away when I was standing there looking at myself in the mirror. I want to feel happy about myself, my gender and who I am. I accept that maybe I'm just a masculine female or a tomboy but I don't think I'm fully transgender. I thought why not ask some people who are familiar with these kinds of situations. Again, thanks for the help CobraKiy3
