Gaydar

Why do you disagree?

Keep in mind that I'm not talking about things like checking out guys, hooking up behind your wife's back, or being obsessed with gay-related topics. A lot of times, it does come down to stereotyping, which means "butch" traits in women, and "swishy" ones in men.

No one can know a stranger's sexuality 100% of the time.

 

In my experience it's more a gestalt thing--oftentimes you really aren't even quite aware what makes you think that but generally I've found that whatever it is is consistent--the same people will ping different people's gaydars. Nobody calls it gaydar when you pick the swishy guy out as gay, it's when you pick the guy out while he's playing pickup basketball or when you can tell that the swishy guy isn't gay that you call it gaydar. And all I can say is that over the twenty some-odd years where I've felt like I had good gaydar I've been wrong maybe a handful of time and I still wonder about some of those (there've been several where it took years to be proven right so I kinda figure the jury's still out on that handful).

If it really was about the stereotypes we'd all be lost. The number of gay people I know who really conform to the stereotypes is definitely a minority.

Just my two cents...:lol:

 

I don't know. If it is, mine's not too good.

 

There are things that ping me, and then I find out I was right about that person, but I think a lot of it is retroactive. Because there are probably plenty of people who ping me I'm wrong about and then I just don't think about it. But I do think there are signifiers. It's just being aware of what a person is telling you covertly. There are worlds of conversation going on that aren't the words we say. I just don't get too hung up on it unless I turn out to be right and then I'm like, "Awww yeah."

 

Funny thing is, she thought my ex-girlfriend, who I also used to work with at the time, was a lesbian or bi. Although that still may be the case. :lol:

 

I'd like to believe that gaydar is a myth and nothing more than a bunch of stereotypes that don't hold, but there's real evidence I can't deny that many people can accurately tell a man's sexual orientation from looks, voice, and mannerisms with accuracy much greater than random chance.
I don't want to be gaydar-able. But I convinced myself and accepted that people can tell that I'm gay and that there's nothing I can do about it.
I went to Colombia to meet a family my father is close to, consisting of a mother, father, and one male and one female child. I figured that they would gaydar me and they would know I'm gay from my voice and mannerisms.
I was shocked when discussing buying gifts for my family at home, the woman asked me, "Do you have a girlfriend?" and I was just like "Um... no". She then said, 'Good, so we don't have to worry about getting a gift for her!" Later on they talked about me searching for girls on the streets, and teased me about girls.
Possibilities?
1) Their gaydars suck.
2) They actually had suspicions that I'm gay but chose to ignore the feelings, thinking it's nothing more than irrational stereotypes.

 

Ok heres the gods honest truth about gaydar:
Gay men all have it to some degree, and lesbians dont. If you go with two-spirit being theory on being gay, gay men identify more with their feminine side and can develop an intuitive sense to discern and read other's actions. Some used to call this a "woman's intuition". Lesbians on the other hand identify with their masculine sense and so when she "detects" a blip its more of a "WISHFULTHINKING-A-DAR" - and those blips for women are based on how cute she thinks the girl is.

Now someone mentioned cartoons. Well not surprisingly, many cartoons and the like are gay and theres even quite a few gay couples if you read between the lines and use your gaydar.

Theres Bert and Ernie, Tom and Jerry, Shaggy and Scooby. Well, obviously if you read between the lines Scooby Doo is a veritable LGBT adventure series where the crew travels around the country in their "mystery machine" unmasking homophobes and investigating cranky old pedophiles who wouldve gotten away with it too, if not for those pesky kids.

And dont even get me started on Tweety and Sylvester and their live-in faghag Granny. She's always refereeing because the two boys are always ardently bickering with one another. Not the healthiest relationship, but i could definitely see their creator basing them off some friends he knew in real life.

Now Bugs on the other hand, hes a real bastard. Bugs is one cruel, sadistic, self-hating, homophobic little bunny! When Daffy Duck coined, "That's Despicable", he was referring to something awful Bugs had done. Bugs just can't come to terms with his own feelings and so he always responds unkindly to Elmer, who's always trying to hunt Bugs down and make an honest man out of him. But Bugs just cant accept himself for who he is so just like how that overly jealous and bipolar wiley coyote is always playing tricks and setting traps for his life partner the roadrunner, Bugs will dress up as a girl bunny and claim "its only fun and games" when he kisses Elmer and then runs away. Bugs' therapist hasnt made much progress with him either, Bugs will greet him and say. "Whats up, Doc?", but after that hes mostly quiet and pulls out a carrot to curb his oral fixation the therapist suggested to help him quit smoking.

Yes, if youget out your gaydar and read between the lines it isnt hard to see that back in the days of old, dysfunctional gay relationship were the basis of many a cartoon. So the next time you watch Donald Duck and start to wonder why he talks a little funny, why he insists on always wearing that bright blue sailor suit and why hes got 3 nephews, Huey, Dewey and Lewey and yet no children of his own, thats your gaydar having a blip - and the incoming target reads as FABULOUS!

-SCANNER

 

There have been a few instances where I thought a guy - who was quite camp / flamboyant - was gay, but he was actually happily married or girlfriended, which has lead me to distrust my gaydar.

There have been a number of instances as well though, that I just knew the moment I shook their hand. Like some kind of electricity passing between our hands and up our arms.

And there have been a couple of instances where I correctly took an educated guess by looking at them - and - in my minds eye, I could not imagine them in an opposite sex relationship. Not because of the way they looked, spoke or acted ... just a something that was hard to put a finger on.

 

I'm about as straight acting as they come. I hid in the closet for 37 years. Pretty much everyone was completely shocked when I came out, but there were a couple of people who knew. I learned that one of those had commented to another person years ago that he just knew I was gay. Of course he was eventually proved right when I did come out. I was amazed to learn that he had already known. Gaydar definitely does exist and some people have it better than others.

 

I watched a documentary which talked about a study which had about 80% accuracy for most people.

Although anecdotal, I've had several gay friends since grade school, and they were completely shocked when I came out to them. As far as gay males, it depends on the person and their mannerisms, particularly how effeminate their actions are and whether or not they're obvious when checking out people of the same-sex.

 

I do have somewhat of a gaydar, but most times I can't confirm it because it's pointing at strangers and going, "Hey, I think that person's gay." Though it's more faulty then not when it comes to close friends XD Especially since usually when I come out they just come out too.

My teacher has a good gaydar, that's what she said about herself, but apparently it's harder to pick up on females. Hilarious since the 4 bent people in my class usually stick together and PDA pretty often, me included ._.

 

Well, I can't if someone is gay or trans, but I can tell if someone is Batman with 95% accuracy.

 

What about that five percent?:roflmao: