im so sick of running, my whole life ive been running..i feel like i dont belong in this body and therefore i dont belong in this world..damnit im trying so hard to stay positive and sober but nuthing seems to help..im falling apart..i cant even talk to girls let alone think one day ill be with one..fuk i just hate my fuking life...i wish i was never born
Drinking is not going to make anything any better. Just keep your head up, good things will come your way eventually. You didn't say a lot on what's going on so that's about the best advice I can give you.
Hold on, friend, please. You deserve to live a full, happy life, and you deserve to go on. I don't know much about drinking, but I do know that people are not always supportive of a relative or friend having troubles with it. Find support, if you don't have it.
Worth mentioning, since you've brought it up - alcohol is literally a depressant. It will depress you - prolonged or extensive use of it will make you feel worse overall. If you are having trouble staying sober, then first off, I'm glad you posted about this to let others know. That's an important first step. Following up with that, I would strongly suggest that you keep talking about it, here on EC as well as possibly with a counselor or local support group if any are available. Step two though - if this feeling has been going on for a long time, before you started drinking, then that's probably something to work on too. What else is going on in your life right now? Any other specific things that you're feeling good about, or feeling bad about?
Slow down mate. Take a breath. I mean. I've been there. Honestly I didn't know it was possible for someone to write while running, but... Damn. Slow the fuck down. I mean that in the best of ways. Slow. The fuck. Down. *Takes deep breath* If you were never born the world would be a completely different place. Be careful what you wish for. You can talk to girls. There are girls on this site, and you are talking to them now. Do you think I'm stupid for saying this? Are you thinking something along the lines of "No shit Sherlock" or "You don't understand", or "That's really not helping."? Look here. Maybe you hate your life, but I don't hate your life. I don't even know you. I know you now though. Right now you're here, on this website, asking for help. Correct? There are people here to help you. We're here for you. Sometimes it might feel like you don't belong. I think I know how that feels, in my own sense of it. Doing what you are now, however... Asking for help?... That's not meaningless. That's progress. Oh, and on another note, running can actually help. In the physical, literal sense, I mean.
