1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Do you believe in the saying 'there is someone for everyone?'

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by I'm_Danni_x, Aug 28, 2016.

  1. I'm_Danni_x

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2014
    Messages:
    384
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    UK
    I was having a conversation with my mum a few weeks ago and she was explaining how everyone has traits a particular person finds attractive (in a heteronormative way but you get the point) and there is always someone out there who loves you unconditionally and is the right person. However, when I asked a friend's parent they completely disagreed with what my mum had said and claimed 'the one' doesn't actually exist at all but is just Based on luck and coincidences.

    Who do you agree with? What is your stance on 'the one'.
     
  2. Czarcastic

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2016
    Messages:
    35
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    New South Wales, Australia
    Gender:
    Male
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I definitely believe there is someone for everyone but I don't think that means that we always find them or they are the person we end up with.

    There is certainly luck involved with finding "the one" but I certainly wouldn't dismiss the idea entirely.
     
  3. Rainsworth

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2015
    Messages:
    52
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    ...
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    I'm quite the negative person, my outlook on life is very dark and depressing, i've been told that by several acquaintances. but i think my opinion about this matter comes in-between your mother's opinion and your friend's parent opinion. i don't think there's someone that will unconditionally love you, it just seems too much of a positive idea for my personal outlook, but i still think life throw some people who are highly interested in you, as chances for a potentially successful relationship, and not as a mere "luck" or "coincidences", in your way and you're the one in charge to decide weather to handle it the right way or mess the chance up. i don't believe there's a single person in this world who has nobody interested in them at all, the thought of that is absolutely terrifying. like even if that person is an outcast or a "loser", based on society's expectations and definition of a "loser", there must be another loser who is at least a little bit interested in them. it's just sometimes people don't notice.

    For example, when it comes to friendships, i was an outcast for the last two years in high school, like i had no friends at all and for an entire two years i used so sit alone 99% of the time, but i still acknowledge the fact that there's a couple of people who tried to befriend me or get to know me, even for a little bit, but i'm the one who shut them down immediately.
     
    #3 Rainsworth, Aug 29, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2016
  4. Brytaleith

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    May 26, 2016
    Messages:
    210
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Shi'Kahr
    Soulmates don't exist. The very idea that someone was made for you is not only damaging, but selfish, not to mention the statistical impossibility of meeting your soulmate (because only a tenth of the world's entire population uptil today is alive).

    Relationships are what you make them out to be. It's your actions and your words and your thoughts that build or break a relationship. It's how to act and how the other person acts that constitute and become what is known as the "perfect relationship". You don't just have a perfect relationship with the perfect person. You make it. With good communication and trust.

    This is not to say that there isn't someone for everyone. It's just, sometimes, that someone is yourself, and other times, it doesn't click instantly, but clicks because you really want it to and try very hard to make it work (which inevitably leads to the fallacy of the existence of soulmates).

    I'm aware that my orientation somewhat invalidates my response towards relationships and romance, but this is my stance on "The One" (which, by the way, is an incredibly cheesy name for a subject of romantic interest. Makes me cringe every time I see it.)
     
    #4 Brytaleith, Aug 29, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2016
  5. iiimee

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 12, 2014
    Messages:
    51
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    In my imagination.
    I agree with this entirely. I think that relationships are things we are meant to work on, and while some must work harder than others, it doesn't change the fact that zero effort = zero happiness in a relationship. Still, I think there are plenty of people who have searched left and right for the perfect mate and just never found one, no matter how hard they looked. :/ It's sad, but I think this happens all the time, especially in today's world, where barely anyone has the time or patience for real romance. X_X I know it seems a little old fashioned, but I really like the concept of trying to "woo" or excite and amaze your partner, before and throughout the relationship. XD I think random acts like that can keep the relationship fresh and fun.
     
  6. PrettyinPunk

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2016
    Messages:
    384
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    MI
    Gender:
    Female
    I think this is one of those questions that is dependent on the person. For me yeah I think there is that one person out there. I also realize in finding them the odds are probably stacked against me. Hopefully I'll get lucky!:icon_bigg

    See to me a soul mate isn't necessarily someone designed for you, at least in the way I think your meaning. More of whatever makes up a person's personality and soul matches with another 'perfectly'. The two people are balanced and a connection like no other is formed.

    Now this doesn't mean that everything will be perfect in the relationship or that it won't take constant work and love. This should be true for any relationship. Things might just run more smoothly so to speak.

    I also agree with constantly wooing a partner throughout the relationship though. I mean being with your lover should always be fun and exciting even if your bored or feel crappy.
     
  7. Libra Neko

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2014
    Messages:
    936
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    the world my mind created
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    There is no such thing as a soul mate, or even worse, "another half."
     
  8. Creativemind

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2015
    Messages:
    3,281
    Likes Received:
    411
    Location:
    Somewhere
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    Other
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I don't think there's such a thing as a soulmate or the one. I think it all happens by chance. You could meet someone who seems perfect for you, but there are also a thousand other people who probably fit that bill. And many people date multiple times.
     
    #8 Creativemind, Aug 29, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2016
  9. Cauldron

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2015
    Messages:
    435
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Androgyne
    Gender Pronoun:
    Other
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I mean there's 7 billion people on the planet, So I think there's a lot more than "The One". :lol:
     
    #9 Cauldron, Aug 29, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2016
  10. JonSomebody

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2012
    Messages:
    1,073
    Likes Received:
    27
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Yes, I totally agrees with your mom...there is someone for everyone...this is a very true fact.
     
  11. ForNarnia

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2014
    Messages:
    242
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Unknown
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    Other
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    I believe there are several people for everyone. I don't think you only get one chance. Love will always find you, even when the world seems dark xx
     
  12. happydavid

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2014
    Messages:
    1,617
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    A town near Birmingham England
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Everyone but me:frowning2:
     
  13. Bobsleigh1

    Bobsleigh1 Guest

    LUCK AND COINCIDENCES BRo...
    I dunno tho, i just don't have opinions on 'things', but i'm too much of a cynical kill joy to believe all that 'The One' bs some people say... (´・_・`)

    But, basically, yeh, there is probably someone (along with thousands of others on this whole planet of billions, but certainly not just one) for everyone. In the same way that we can have multiple potential good friends, we can also have multiple potential good partners that are, indeed, met through luck and coincidences, but also practically perfect for ya (most likely due to, like, traits and interests working well together but certainly not because of, like, '~**Ɛ>Destiny<3**~' or some shit, yanno?).

    You'd meet them through luck and coincidences, they'd work well with you and be a snazzily affectionate as heck friend that you can fuck who practically unconditionally loves you, but 'all relationships are difficult' and i think that that statement, itself, kind of proves that no one is 10000% perfect and 'meant to be' with another, but 9999% perf is close enough for that shit to work out nicely.
    So, i guess both parents were kinda right. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
     
    #13 Bobsleigh1, Aug 29, 2016
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 29, 2016
  14. Austin

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2008
    Messages:
    3,172
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Los Angeles, CA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I believe there's a cohort of people for every person. It may not always be easy to find that person.
     
  15. Geek

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2013
    Messages:
    372
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Hawaii
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    All but family
    I don't think anyone has "the one". I do however, think that everyone can find someone that they're happy with, love and wish to spend the rest of their life with. Let's say everyone dates 20 people before getting married. That's still 5% of people you dated. They're 7+ billion people on the planet. Even accounting for having a "type", I bet there are still thousands of people in the world that you could potentially fall in love with based on their traits.

    I don't buy into the idea that you have a "soulmate" or that you have "the one". I simply think there are people, and people you get along with and like more than others. So to answer the question: I think there is someone for everyone but they aren't the only person you two can fall in love.
     
  16. Devil Dave

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2015
    Messages:
    1,077
    Likes Received:
    305
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I think I agree with your friend's mum. It's more about luck. And I've had very little of that when it comes to meeting 'the one'. I have felt a lot of love for a lot of men, but they have not reciprocated. I've been approached by a lot of men, but they weren't the type of person I wanted to be with. So I'm clearly not attracting the type of person I want. It seems like a lottery to me - just keep losing until I get lucky.
     
  17. Lawrence

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2014
    Messages:
    2,134
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    After everything I've seen in my relatively short life, I'm inclined to think there are many compatible people for everybody or almost everybody
     
  18. scapaviella

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2016
    Messages:
    19
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    London
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Exactly! I don't think there's some ONE out there but several someones.
     
  19. notmyfault

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2016
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NYC
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I don't think there's such thing as "the one" or a perfect match. No perfect people, no perfect matches. And besides, aromantic people exist, and polyamorous people, and alloromantics who just don't want relationships. I mean, you can definitely find someone you love and are happy with, but this concept of "everyone has one perfect match" is just silly.
     
  20. Misadori

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2016
    Messages:
    124
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    Sweden
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I do believe that there's somebody for everybody:slight_smile: I've been thinkin' like that since high school, believin' that humans aren't born to be alone:slight_smile: People might that they're the odd one out and wonder if they ever gonna find it's true love. I have been thinkin' like that many times and I surely feel that I somethin' different. Sometimes, it just feels so... hopeless, like it never gonna happen to me.

    But in the end: Humans aren't born to be alone, so yes! There's always somebody for someone:wink: