Met a man

Well I am not sure what to say here .First off that is great that you met a nice man . I am wondering would it be a bad thing to be just friends if he turns out to be straight ?
only advise I can give you is what I might do if I was in your shoes .
I would prob sit down with him and try to explain how you feel about him . Say something like hey ?..... what ever his name is I have something I would like to discuss with you and I do not want to freak you out or anything like that ,but I am Bisexual and I am looking to share my life with a really nice man .I am not sure how you feel about me or if you would even be interested in going down that path I will understand if you say no . If he says no then you can always say something like we can be friends and have great times together .
I am prob way off here I am trying to figure out what to do in my life right now too . I wish you all the best of luck and please let us know what happens .

 

What's your confidence that he's gay or bisexual?

The easiest and most direct way is to come out as bisexual yourself and see how he reacts.

If you prefer a more subtle approach, watch how he reacts when a hot guy walks by. Do his eyes follow the guy and check him out? Or you could point out a hot guy and see how he reacts.

You could checkout online gay dating sites and see if you see his profile.

Or you could assume that he's gay/bisexual and wait for him to ask you out or even better ask him out (!)

 

Just slow down cowboy. Nice and easy. Sure, in a perfect world, it would be great to hit it off instantly with a guy you're attracted to. But that's seldom the case. (But, he might be hoping the same thing as you, but just as afraid to say so). Just take it nice and easy. Men are like horses. (Some more so than others:icon_wink.) Slowly move closer to him, emotionally and physically. Watch how he responds. Hopefully positively. Come at him too fast and he might turn and run away. Just be confident in yourself. That's what's most important. And that's what makes a man attractive to other men. Good luck!

 

Get out of your head - it's an unhealthy place to be.

Relax.

Meet him again. At some point, touch him, like put your hand on his arm, touch his shoulder, hug him - & see if his reaction is positive. If it is, chances are, he's attracted to u. Good luck!

 

Very savvy post above mine. The alternative is just to say hey, I'm not sure... are you...? The choice is just whatever you feel comfortable with.

 

Great advice from BeingDude!

 

Jhilde, are you sure this would cause trouble in his marriage? Perhaps they have an open relationship. I would voice your concerns to him and talk about why you're hesitant. I'm starting to realise honesty seems to work best for me in these situations.

 

Hey

As someone who, pretty recently, was that guy. YOU are not the one causing trouble in his marriage. Just joking here...but, you alone aren't going to make this guy notice men!

It comes comes down to your comfort level with having a fling with a guy that may need to hide. Barista is correct. He may have an arrangement with his wife or be considering asking her. At this point, pretty much any conversation should be fair game as you are both out to each other.

You could just be friends too!

 

I'm there with a guy too. I am out to my wife he is not. I'm not sure I want to be the "other man" but he is hot and it is safe. Good luck figuring out what you want to do. I am probably going to go for it!

He continues to tell me he is cheating not me. I totally get the situation you're in. But, it really is his problem, not yours...if you are just looking for a fling. If you really think it could be romantic, I would avoid it.

 

Has your wife agreed to allow you to have a fling with another man? As I recall, you were still working on this arrangement.

 

Sounds like you had a wonderful time (!)

Please keep in mind that since this appears to have been his first experience with another guy, that he may not call you because the 2 hours made very real questions about his sexuality that he now has to work through. As you must know from your own experience, there are wild swings of emotion during the questioning period, including euphoria and denial, so you should expect erratic behavior. You may need to take the initiative and call him if you are interested in more than a one-time hookup. Hopefully it will work out for you, though you need to be prepared mentally in case it does not.

 

I'm not saying that you should leave him alone, just be aware that people who are questioning their sexuality can behave erratically. It seems to me that you have expectations that he'll end up as your lover. I'm suggesting that you dial these back somewhat, otherwise you'll potentially end up disappointed. It's also possible it will work out. So take things slow and focus on enjoying his company rather than driving towards a label. Like you said, you need to calm down and roll with it

 

Even if you manage to arrange a second "date" with this guy, you need to ask yourself, "How likely is it that the first guy I meet turns out to be 'the one?'" In other words, be aware that much of what you're feeling is probably projection on your part — the man you're seeing is the man you want to see. Becoming too invested in a first-time single-sex relationship can be a recipe for heartbreak, and you need to guard against it. That said, go out and have fun! Be open to everything.