How Long Did You Stay In The Closet?

For me personally, I've known since I was about 12 years old (7th grade) and I'm 22 now. I've always tried to repress my feelings for guys, and tried to convince myself I was straight. I still haven't come out, but I want to eventually. I've been hiding it all to myself, and it adds so much weight to my chest and shoulders. I just want to breathe

 

If we're talking from the time I allowed myself to admit that I'm gay to myself then it's just been just 2 or 3 years - since I was about 28 or 29, but from the time of really knowing but not acknowledging it, it's been well over 10 years. I really don't know if I'll ever go public, especially not with my family. I don't think I got what it takes to deal with it. Most of the time I think they know anyway, but the thought of the attention and scrutiny makes me feel ill.

 

2 months so far and counting. Only discovered/accepted I'm not straight 2 months ago, though I think I've always sort of known on some level, just didn't let myself think about it. So technically, I could say 28 years and counting. But for me, it only truly started 2 months ago. As far as coming out, I've told my therapist. I've hinted at it with a few close friends, but as I am part of a very conservative environment, coming out would basically destroy my life as I know it. I just have too much to process right now to even consider doing that at the moment. Who knows? Maybe someday.

 

Still in there. It's about 10 years I know about myself.

 

Until I was 16, but it's never too late!

Good luck!!

 

A year and a bit before I told anyone and nearly 2 years until my parents asked

 

I've known I was different since I was 12, but couldn't put a name on it until I was 28. I'm 44 now and I just came out to my friend a couple months ago. I've spent the last 16 years doing everything I can to 'fix' myself but I've finally given up. So, I've been living with my 'terrible secret' for about 32 years, but wasn't even sure what was wrong until 16 years ago. Not sure it counts as being in the closet if you think the problem is mental illness and not an alternate gender identity.

 

Was questioning 6 months ago and came out to LGBTQ friends 3 months ago, came out to this website today, and pretty sure not gonna come out to everyone else for a while.

I'd say my head's sticking out of the closet.

 

Almost 25 years.

 

First time I came out to a friend was when I was 16. Currently I'm out to my sister, my co-workers (some of them at least), and any friends I make online.

I'm not at the stage where I would deny it but I'm also not really shouting it from the rooftops yet. If someone were to ask me, I'd probably not deny it. Unless of course it was someone from my homophobic side of the family.

Some people in my family can never know. My mother's side of the family specifically would curse me and my father's side would treat me as a laughing stock.

But idk. Maybe a few years down the road, I'll do something not even my bisexual sister did, and come out on facebook where everyone can see, knowing full well a lot of them would start to detest me.

 

Hmmm... Maybe a year? I'm not that good at keeping secrets. Actually kidding. I told my best friend after... a month. Then I stayed closeted for maybe a year. My gender took two years. I'm most of the way out by now.

 

I knew when I was about 16 that I liked guys... but I didn't want to accept it at all. I waited till I was 25 before realising that it wasn't going to go away. I came out then too ... but nowadays I feel like I am back in the closet (after having lived abroad in a country where one can't be open at all)... and m ymother is not really that ok with it (my sister and dad - they're fine) - I mean it's ok as long as I don't date or have gay friends in real life... this and I am 36! I have online friends for now... sigh...

 

When I realised it, it took less than a year to come out to my friends (not my family even if they would accept it), and from then, I come out to everyone who asks, mostly.

 

I realized it for about 7 years (at age 29) that I probably was into girls, but kind of known all my life, just didn´t want to accept it. For about 3 months ago I really knew after falling in love with an amazing woman <3 and I have accepted it. I have not told anyone yet, only shared it here on this forum.

 

I've pretty much known since I hit the double digits, but I didn't come out until senior year in high school and even then it was only a few.

Part of me regrets not coming out earlier, but mostly I fear the zealots will find out and take me in my sleep. :redface:

 

I had feelings for women from the age of 14. Knew I was gay in my early twenties but couldn't accept it. Finally came out when I was 35. I regret not coming out sooner but I'm glad I've done it now.

 

Tried to repress for a really long time. Knew I had a sexual attraction to males (I'm bi) starting by 14, didn't ever tell a single soul until my wife when I was 30. She's been amazing btw.

I really regret being dishonest w myself and hiding for so long. It made it impossible for me to have any best friends FOR DECADES and greatly contributed to my anxiety disorder as a whole. If I had to do it again, I'd have come out younger and eaten the consequences.

 

I didn't. Came out immediately.

 

I have known since about the age of 13, and only now am realizing that it is true. I am gay and it only took ~8 years(sarcasm)... =/ I do have to admit my entire high-school experience was a regret, because I never was my true self. Now at the age of 21 I am left questioning are the friends and people I have come to know over the course of my entire life still going to accept me knowing this. The longer I am in the closet the more there is to fall apart.

 

731 days from when I admitted it to myself to when I told my parents.
Though my parents weren't the first to know and there are still plenty of people who don't know.