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Bit of a dilemma :/

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Spot, Jul 7, 2016.

  1. Spot

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    I'm going back to school in two days after today and when I get back, I'll be partnered up with a younger kid. I think they'll be 5 years old, I don't know what day I'll meet them. I was supposed to on the second last day of school but I had a stomach virus so I was at home for most of that week. I know that like half of my grade was sick or had other commitments or just didn't bother showing up so I don't feel too guilty. Anyway, I'm kind of dreading the whole thing and I need some advice on what to do.

    So I'm probably going to be partnered with a girl, I'm 99% sure of that. Guys are supposed to get boys and girls are supposed to get girls but even though I've come out to multiple staff members, I know I'm getting a girl. That's a little annoying but not a big deal except for the fact that I'm supposed to teach her to be a well-behaved Christian girl and I have no idea how to do that. Basically, I don't know if this is a moral dilemma or an ethical dilemma or both. I don't know how to be a Christian or a girl, I can be well-behaved if I think that the rules are fair but I don't think that the school rules are fair... :/ I don't even know the difference between "boy" and "girl". I also don't think that I should force her to be something that she isn't. I don't want her to think that she has to be feminine or always follow the rules or that she has to be a girl or a Christian. I would've liked to have known that when I was 5 years old and if she does turn out to be trans* (even though it's unlikely) or non-conforming or an atheist, I want her to know that someone supported her and believed her.

    Now then, the problem is that a lot of staff and students already hate my stupid face :slight_smile:P) or my political and religious beliefs (or lack of) and I don't want to draw anymore attention to myself. I'm worried about getting suspended or expelled, I don't care but my parents will probably kill me. I just want things to be quiet for a while, I don't want to worry about being different again. So I could just teach her everything the school wants me to and feel absolutely awful about it (I literally feel like I'm destroying her childhood if I do) or I could teach her that she can be whatever she wants and cause more trouble. I also don't know if I should be honest with her and come out because she might tell others and out me to the whole school/possibly get me suspended or expelled. I might even have to mentor the kid with another person in my grade (2 16 year olds taking care of 1 5 year old) and what if we teach her two different things?

    Ugh. What should I do? Will I even matter that much to her anyway? I had one of these partners when I was 5 and I don't even remember them that well :/
     
  2. Shorthaul

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    I'm going with you might be over thinking it a bit. It's a 5 year old, most of the stuff you worry about she won't understand at the slightest. Just relax and try and have fun, cover the important stuff and slip in a little opinion now and then.
     
  3. Spot

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    Thanks for your reply, I know I tend to overthink things :slight_smile: I like to plan everything out and prepare for like every scenario, especially when it's something I've never done before because then I don't have an idea of what to expect. I have a feeling that I won't have to tell her too much but I still want to be ready I guess.
     
  4. Zen fix

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    Yeah this probably isn't as big a deal as you think. At five you'll be lucky to get the kid to listen to you at all. I'm sure some of the lesson will be about God's love and it is appropriate to emphasize the unconditional aspect of this love.
     
  5. kobra kid

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    Well, if you aren't worried about being a hypocrite I would say to just teach the kid what they want you to teach her. That's what I would do. If you feel like that would be too dishonest or you don't want to promote Christianity, then maybe throw in an opinion here and there. If that would get you in trouble, though, maybe avoid outright telling the kid that God is dead or something of that nature. Maybe just give general life advice tips to her on how to be a decent person. That way you get around the whole religion/gender thing but still give solid lessons.

    In the end, think of it this way: You go to school in a religious institution, from what I gather. Even if you don't thoroughly indoctrinate her, someone else there will. If you decide to play it safe and teach her what the school says to, just know that your teachings will just be a drop of water in a bucket full of religious ideals. It's a sucky situation, but you're beating yourself up over something that isn't as consequential as you make it out to be.

    If you really can't make a choice just throw a dart at one of those alignment charts and structure your plans around whatever you land on (e.g., lawful good would be teaching exactly as the school wants you to). Good luck!