Hi.. Straight to the point, Do I need to come out to my family? Do I have too?? Scary. Coming out to everyone else was easy but thinking about coming out to my family scares the living hell out of me. Sure would be nice to be myself around home though. My oldest brother knows about me, but thats all from my family. It was new years and I was drunk and went over to his place, waking him up in the middle of the night to have a serious chat, atleast it was serious and important to me. I went with the "drunk" approach, thinking maybe if I decided to go back in the closet in the morning I could try play it off as a drunken joke, but truth be told, my mind was more conscious and clear than ever, despite the alcohol than ran through me that night. But I did play the drunken joke the morning after I told him the news. He texted me asking if I remembered going over to his house, and I said "no?" .. not exactly a "joke" but more of me pretending not to have told him.. so he said "oh ok" and I asked if I came, pretending like i didnt know, so he said "yea u came by to look for something u left the other day".. I was relieved. But saddened that I just lied to him.. he was supportive and told me that i had no worries of being shamed about it.. and I just lied.. but I did come back to that subject a week later and told him and he said he knows, and he knew even before the night Ive told him.. he knew for along time infact.. i asked if everyone else in the family has suspected or knew.. turns out they didnt have a clue or anything.. They think in a relationship with one of my bestfriends who is a female. Anyways months pass and I still feel weird and awkward and regret to have told him about me.. I feel uncomfortable in my own skin when Im around my brother but not when im around everyone else that knows which is basically the whole world except the very few family members I have.. other lgbt friends I have has said maybe u need to come out to the family.. but on my own time. And yes ofcourse but do I need to? Or do I have to? I dont want to hide anybody special from them and I have found my one and only.. I dont want to hide it.. but if I come out to my family.. will I feel uncomfortable even more around them like I do with my brother?? Im a whole different person when Im out of the house and away from my family and another person when Im with my family.. :help:
hi I think you don´t have to come out to your family, it´s not neccesary and if you don´t feel like it, you simple don´t have to the other question is if you need to...but I can´t really help you with that because only you know what you need and want I would maybe suggest thinking about why you feel uncomfortable around your brother even when he was supportive why do you feel uncomfortable? what is it that´s bothering you? You can try talk about your orientation and related things with your brother, maybe talking can help...this actually helped me with being comfortable around my mother after I come out to her except her, I wasn´t uncomfortable around anyone else...usually people who know it about me joke with me and we have inside jokes (often in front of family members who don´t know ) maybe when you will be talking with your brother more you will become more comfortable in your "skin" ) and eventually with coming out to your family but if you don´t want to then it´s okay too....you don´t have to I am also not out to all my family, only to my mum and few cousins ) other people in my family don´t know and I´m fine with it now but I am not ruling out the coming out...maybe someday Anyway, good luck )
