Just not happy.

I know what you mean, I have a hard time sticking with diets or exercise. I'd suggest you slowly ease yourself into a healthier diet so it can become more of a habit, maybe go shopping using a list, it'll help you stay on track more. Buying vegetables can be expensive at times but I've figured buying frozen veggies can be cheaper. I know grapes can be pretty expensive but putting some in the freezer can make for a nice snack. If you can, try getting help from a nutritionist so you can better improve your diet. I don't see anything wrong with treating yourself to something less healthy now and then, I'd be a hypocrite to say that it's wrong and should be avoided.

As for exercise I'll say this, it's like studying, what works for someone else might not work for you. Exercise is a learned habit like pretty much everything else. It might take you a while but find what helps you. There are various free videos of full exercise routines on youtube but if that's not your preference, there's also a website called Darebee that has a bit of everything. You can also try just jogging, maybe set goals in your mind for how long you want to jog and how long you want to walk. Or even better, if there's a school stadium around you that is sometimes open to the public you can run/walk on the track.

I know it's a hard thought to break but you can't compare yourself to other people, it'll just make you feel disappointed. There are those with different body types and different metabolisms not to mention, different habits. Comparing yourself to others is like saying you have said person's similar lifestyle. Just strive to be a better you and work on self-improvement, I know it's easier said than done but I'm sure you can do it!

Here's an example of Darebee's workouts, they're pretty easy to follow along with. I'll be honest and say the sitting punches can be brutal but you'll get used to it.

 

How much do you weigh? What is your height?

 

first, check with your doctor, see what they say and they might suggest ways for you.
Its hard to do it alone, I've been battling for years.

I'd loose a few kilo's , winter comes and I put it back on, and it does depend on your eating and emotional state too as I know when I'm depressed I'll bing eat..
also try some short walking first, on easy ground , I can now walk about 2 1/2 kilomiters which I could never do before.. little steps ,and if you have a smartphone download one of those apps that show you how far you walk , its very inspiring after wards...

and take some good music to listen or the radio etc..
I know its hard going, been there and I'm still struggling..
good luck ..

 

With the diet stuff, it might be helpful to regularly visit a dietitian. They can help you to learn more about getting the nutrients you need and having a healthy diet.

 

my mom jump ropes she uses a weighted jump rope and dose 2000 jumps a day it has done wonders for her in a vary short time

 

I can only tell you what worked for me:

1) diet wise, eat what you like but eat (a lot) less. Also don't think you have to finish something if you are not hungry. Just save it for later.
2) exercise wise, try something that you think you can stick to. Ideally it should be something you can easily incorporate into your daily routine. For me I simply run in a gym near me. It took me a while to get used to it but now I would feel miserable if I didn't exercise.

It is surely going to be slow and there will be lots of ups and downs so you have to be kind to yourself but also remember not to give up.

As for self-confidence (again my own experience), I always feel more confident when I start to act on my thoughts. It applies to almost all aspects of my life. I cannot just stand in front of a mirror and boost my confidence by saying to myself how great I am. I have to do something concrete to feel better.

 

Hi there,

There are a couple important things that you have mentioned: losing weight and changing your mindset about beauty. I am going to address the second one first.

Changing your mindset, like losing weight is going to take a lot of time, however, there is nothing wrong with seeing beauty in others and in having preferences in what you find attractive, provided you don't associate that with self worth and confidence. Just like there is a broad spectrum of physical appearances, there is a broad spectrum of what people find attractive, and what you see as beautiful might not align with the viewpoint of others. Learning to separate attraction from self worth is important. Just because you don't fit your own viewpoint, doesn't mean you are less beautiful and doomed to spending your life alone. In fact, I would think most people don't ever fit the perfect image of what they find attractive in someone else. E.g. for me, it is body hair. I hate it on me and do everything I can to get rid of most of it, but on someone else, I really couldn't care at all how hairy they are. It is similar for most other qualities as well. The key here is to really find ways to boost your confidence (finding things you are good at, working hard and succeeding at something, reminding yourself that you are good the way you are, etc.) if that is the main issue.

Feeling envious of someone else's body type, as you have described it, may not necessarily be a bad thing either, again provided you are happy with who you are as a person. I think having an ideal body image of yourself is important and striving to achieve that is a worthy goal. As long as you are able to be confident along the way and overall happy with who you are as a person, making positive changes to your lifestyle and bodyweight are good goals to have. Long story short, I don't think you need to be scared that you want to look like others, as long as you maintain perspective on how that viewpoint affects your confidence and your ability to view yourself as a valuable person worth of love and affection regardless.

Now, the weight issue. I do think weight loss is important for you from a health perspective. Currently, your BMI is > 40, which puts you in the highest class of obesity (very severely obese). I am not saying this to make you feel bad, but rather emphasize the weight loss is very important for you for a number of health and cardiometabolic risk reasons. You are at high risk for heart disease, CVD, not to mention things like diabetes as well.

Losing weight is an intricate process that involves commitment to diet, exercise and lifestyle changes. It is important to build habits, which means doing something for at least 21 days. Once you hit this mark, things begin to become routine so try hanging in there for just one more week next time you begin your diet and you will see it will become easier over time. Same with exercise.

Here are a few helpful tips that have worked for me, worked for others. There are also a lot of resources online (from good sources) that have information on types of foods to eat but in general:

1) try to find someone to do this with. You will keep each other motivated and accountable

2) dont weight yourself too often (max once per week). Daily fluctutions can make it seem like you are not doing well when you in fact are.

3) avoid foods that are fried and avoid foods high in sugar (soft drinks, concentrated fruit juice, baked goods). Replace these with foods high in protein (lean meat) and good fats (olive oils, avacado, seeds, nuts)

4) drink a lot of water - often our body confuses thirst for hunger and drinking a glass of water can satisfy that.

5) do a combination of cardio exercises and weights (legs, and back a lot --> big muscles = more calorie burning) - cardio will burn more calories but weights will continue to burn calories longer after the workout is over.

6) dont overdo it at once. If you are too sore or hurt from a workout, you won't go back soon enough to build a habit - work hard, but make sure you know your limits when first starting off

7) try not eat right before bed.

8) eat slow - when you eat fast you overeat because your body doesn't sense you are full right away.

9) track what you eat and hold yourself accountable.

I know this seems like a lot and in itself can be overwhelming. That's normal. Take it one day at a time and don't give up. You can do it. It is a slow process but it can be done. I lost over 50lbs and have kept it off for over 5 years now. You can do it!