Coming Out to Myself?

I think I missed a critical step. Basically just jumping straight (pardon the pun) into a lesbian relationship with feelings I didn't know existed. The thing is, I failed to really look at myself, since I was so enthralled with this person who just completely got me from day 1. I think back on every single one of my hetero relationships and realize I was never ever myself. Everything seems so natural, so completely normal with her. I don't worry about what she thinks or how she views me. She doesn't care if my body's not perfect. I'm not sure if the men cared, but I was so concerned that they cared. Little things like that.

I've even figured out what kind of woman I'm attracted to, which until very recently I denied was possible. BTW, it's somewhat of a soft butch. I never really thought about it until we were in the lesbian bar and my gf asked me what kind of women there I felt I could be attracted to. So, since I started on here, I've decided that I'm not just attracted to my gf but attracted to women in general. First and foremost, I must feel a connection to someone, but I realize now that if this relationship doesn't work out I probably would end up with another woman. Strange to actually realize that.

I guess the bottom line is even though I felt different, I still have issues to work through and a lot of self-discovery. So....I guess I'm working on coming out to myself.

 

Well, I have dated men forever and just nothing ever seemed right. I tried everything and just never felt a connection. I didn't want to be with someone just for the sake of being with someone. I didn't know what I was looking for, but I was always sure that when I found him, I would know. Turns out, it wasn't a him after all.