I'm not out properly. I've been to several social get togethers, it's taken SO much courage, my confidence is low following my last relationship. The latest meeting a few days ago went well, I enjoyed it, they're a friendly, funny group of women. I felt attracted to someone, just sitting with this awareness seemed huge. It's been a long time since I've heard the sound of my own laughter! I've been contemplating talking to my closest friend (she's straight) about going to the group, my realizations etc. She's got a gay sibling so don't think she'd react badly. But something makes me hold back. One woman at the meeting shared she was divorced. I'm divorced. I think I was worried how they'd view me because of that. I've been feeling down because I realised just how low my confidence has gone. I'm going slowly. I'd like a partner but I think I need to take things slowly. Sitting in that group of funny, friendly women, really recognizing my feelings felt a bit surreal. I am aware of the kind of woman I'm attracted to now.
Get it, girl! Big deep breath and realize that you are awesomely-made and can do this at a pace that is right for you. Get some more of that laughter in your life, Challenge yourself but realize the only person in this race is you. We're proud of you!
Thank you both. I spoke to my friend this morning, found it really, really hard to get the word's out, she said nothing could shock her, I jumped! She wasn't phased at all!!!!! I said I'd been to a few meetings, that I felt comfortable with the women there. She was so kind in her response. So, first I admitted it to myself...and now I've told someone I know. I didn't expect to do this when I woke this morning. I'm challenging things every single day by following through and not going back to my ex. Even going to a meet up is going against my homophobic family, challenging beliefs that must have impacted me. Thanks again, can't believe I told someone I know!
I think it's great that you opened up to your friend. You need people to share your life with. I'm also a divorced ex-straight person and I can tell you it does get easier. Be patient and take it slow. Only tell those you think will be supportive at this point. You don't need any negativity in your life. Eventually you will find the one and your whole world will change. I personally don't think you need to change your girly appearance as many lesbian are attracted to that. On the other hand if your looking for a partner it is harder to find one if you are hidden amongst all the straight house wives. Perhaps rainbow earrings are in order or something more obvious like a "Yes I am" T-shirt.
Thanks for replying! I know Im not ready to be with anyone yet, still getting over stuff, but i hope i will meet "the one" when the times right. It was big to admit to myself im not straight let alone my friend, she was lovely, im so glad i was cautious who i came out too. I know family wont react well with how they treat a lesbian couple in their local pub. 1 step at a time. For a long while ive wondered if i was bi. Lol ok will look for some rainbow jewellery! Thanks for the support.
(!)(!)(!) AWESOME!!! Super proud of you!! As another poster said, be careful of who you tell right now, esp. with your homophobic family. You don't need their negative shit right now. Focus on an approach that will validate and reinforce your positive self-image. For example, talk to your friend who you just came out to and see who she thinks would also be supportive, then make a plan. You've got this, Birdie! (*hug*)
Thank you! Yes i think caution who i share with is really imprortant for now. I dont feel i want to tell anyone else for now. My friend mentioned it again today, nothing heavy. Im really glad she reacted in a positive way. Ive ordered some rainbow earrings! Might take me a bit to get the courage to wearing them though lol! Thank you. I went through a stage of wondering if i should try to be/look less girly but i wouldnt be being true to myself, so thanks for that.
