Hey guys! Today my mom was making dinner while I was using the microwave and she said 'I'm sure you will make a woman happy when you grow up' and it just made me think about how I want to come out so bad yet it feels as scary as death. I guess the main reason I'm scared is my mom is against from LGBT (atleast that's how it appears when she talks about it). I have been eating a lot less and have been working out but have been gaining weight (I never really have gained weight before) and I'm gaining fast. Within a month and a half I gained 11 pounds. Yeah I am growing and I am tall but you can defiently see I have a little belly of fat. I have fear that me not telling my mom is stressing me to where I am gaining weight. Note: When I first started noticing I was gay I ate a lot but that was only like a day. Also I had girlfriends because everyone else was and that was the norm but I didn't actually have feelings toward them and my mom would never suspect im gay. I don't even let myself think about coming out to my grandma, papa, or uncle. It is more stressful then coming out to my mom which already is so I don't even let myself think about telling them. Please help me! I am taking depression and anxiety pills and doing things to make me happy but being locked up in the closet gives me lots of stress
Silverdeer the stress from you not telling your mom could be the cause of you gaining weight. The reason I say this is because I am experiencing the same thing not telling my wife. Which is in the works at the moment. I have came out to both my parents and my brother, all three are supportive of me after I told them. Good luck in this journey.
Silverdeer, you should talk to her, soon. Ever asked her what she thought of gays? Tell her you have a friend (I hope I am ) who is gay. Tell her that he invited to his house next weekend. See what'll happen. I glad mom and dad are open-minded, I hope your mom is.
Thank you and I wish you luck in your journey too. Well she brings up the topics on her own about gays and I can tell she doesn't like them. She even said there is something wrong with them. Also I can't say I'm going to a gay friends house as she would drive me to nowhere since I have never even seen a gay in my town. Edit: I have seen her and my uncle talk about gays and especially from one conversation it seemed like they hated them ---------- Post added 7th Mar 2016 at 07:12 PM ---------- Maybe I could talk to my therapist about it? She has always been nice to me and she has always told me I'm normal and I currently see her because of my depression and anxiety. I know the conversation would start like this though: 'I need to talk about something stressful and far away from my mom.' And I bet she wouldn't be able to make that happen though since my mom drives me there and stays in the lobby which is only seperated by a wall... I just really want to talk to someone irl... get it off my chest, etc Honestly she has been so nice I assume she won't just say 'Oh somethings wrong with you.' I feel like she could help me figure out.. how to tell my mom.
Silverdeer, as a 13 year old, I wish I could help you. I might tak t my parents to see what they'll say
If they're at all religious, figure out how strict they are in that aspect. If they seem totally OK with it, it should be like telling someone you're left handed. If you get my drift. Good luck, anyhow (*hug*)(&&&)(!)
I think your idea of telling your therapist is probably a pretty good idea. If you are worried about your mom hearing then write her a note. It sounds like you are ready to come out. If you have any real good friends that you trust you could consider telling them. You could also tell a guidance counselor at your school. Think it over and make sure you are ready, you don't have to come out right away. It takes a lot of courage to do this, I wish you the best of luck.
Right now I feel like I am tired of waiting and need to make it happen. :icon_wink I chose a wink smiley but I'm not hinting at anything
It breaks my heart to see someone so young going through this, I hope your family is supportive when you decide to take the leap... stay strong : )
Thank you I hope I am able to come out to atleast my mom soon as like I said it stresses me not telling her.
Silverdeer, My dad lost his cousin when he came out and they kicked him out. I would see if you have a place near you for homeless gay teens. We have one locally. I would tell your mom that you love her, however, you love boys. Tell her that you been liking boys since you were 6 or 7. (Jake been in love with me since we were both 7.) Tell her you'll still give her a grandkid... (yes, I believe gay dads will have a chance to be biodads...). Anyway, good luck...I'm glad I'm out to my family and Jake's family.
I live in a town of 100,000 people and the towns within an hour of us are way smaller. The closest town that is big has over a million people and does have a lgbt homeless teens place but the town is 2 and a half hours away. Also I don't think my mom would get rid of me even if she doesn't like it.. ---------- Post added 8th Mar 2016 at 10:11 PM ---------- Alright I think I know how I want to do it now. - Call my therapist and ask her how we can talk in private (We can't talk over phone) (Maybe have my mom go to the store while we talk?) - Tell her I am gay - Ask how to come out to mom and bring up her views she has Seem good? ---------- Post added 8th Mar 2016 at 10:12 PM ---------- Can't edit but on step 2 I meant to add: - Tell her I'm gay AND it stresses me not telling my mom.
Good luck in coming out man, taking to therapist prob will be great first step. As for your small town... My city has less than 4,000 people lol so 100,000 wow huge lol