Hey internet! I am very confused, and am reaching out in the hopes of reaching others with similar experiences or anyone who has some knowledge or advice on my situation. Here goes: I cannot seem to get my sexual attraction and romantic attraction to line up. I have always been sexually attracted to women. From a young age I always thought about women when I masturbated, BUT I always had crushes on boys. I have literally never had romantic feelings for any of my female friends or any other woman. I've had a few boyfriends, and am with a wonderful man right now. I think I'm in love with him (he knows everything that's going on, we were friends first). I enjoy sex with him, but it's not like a "oh my god i have to have you right now" kind of lust. I want him because I love him, but I feel like I'm not attracted enough to his body. In short: I think I am sexually attracted to women but romantically attracted to men, and it's really tearing me up. I can't imagine being in love with a woman, and am worried that I don't have enough physical attraction to men. Any advice is much appreciated! Thank you!
I'm sorry to hear that you could be bisexual Or you could be gay ask yourself a few question who would you like to travel the world with who would you like to have sex with? Do the feeling of being with a man and not a woman arouse you? Those are all important questions you could be gay but haven't accepted yourself yet I was similar to you I denied my self for two years I would Always masurbate to straight porn not gay and I'd turn gay on and turn it off because I said I wasn't attracted to it but in reality I was watching girls Vagina really didn't make me feel good at all it looked gross and I wouldn't want to do anything sexual with it I do notice when a girl is attractive but I wouldn't do anything more than that with guys The porn is so much better the gay guys looks are really cute and sexy I am Romanticlly and sexually attracted to men I've never been with a women before in my life and neither a man but I figured out over the course of two years I was in extreme denial at most of those two years but then I finally accreted myself and then came out!
Hey there! Sometimes, romantic and sexual attraction don't line up, and that's totally okay. One of my friends describes it as being bisexual and heteromantic, meaning she's sexually attracted to men and women, but romantically attracted to men. You're not alone! I hope this helps!
Hello there! It could be that you're a heteroromantic homosexual and your romantic and sexual orientation are indeed out of sync. It could also be that you have not accepted yourself fully and aren't giving yourself a chance to be romantically attracted to women. I was like you once, but I think that if you open yourself up more to the possibility to be romantically attracted to women, you might discover you're capable of it. Only time can tell if that's the case!
Hi Berrysorbet Welcome to EC :welcome: While you are free to identify however you want, the notion that romantic and sexual attraction can be separated into labels such as "heteroromantic homosexual" isn't backed up by credible research. So while it may be helpful to think of yourself in these terms while you question your sexuality, this label isn't getting to the heart of the matter. One's sexual orientation determines both sexual and romantic attraction. Based on what you've written you are sexually attracted to women but are not romantically attracted to women. It sounds like you are more sexual attracted to women than men. You did not mention that you've ever been with a woman, so I'm assuming that you have not been. Based on what you've posted, it sounds like you are either bisexual with a stronger preference for women (probably Kinsey 4 or 5) or a lesbian. The fact that you don't feel romantic attraction to women is probably because you aren't yet fully comfortable with that side of your sexuality, either because of internalized homophobia or lack of experience with women. If you haven't had a sexual experience with a woman, then you would benefit from having one. If you do this, please don't do this behind your BF's back. Either let him know first or break up with. HTH
I think you could also think about what properties in men are the ones you are attracted to romantically. There are feminine men, masculine men, feminine women and masculine women (and some that are in between all that). It just might be that you would be more interested in masculine women in romantic sense. Maybe you have just met wrong kind of women for you to fall in love.
