This thread is going to be short but to the point, as I'm sick of what I'm going through and want to try and quickly try and help myself. I think I may have anxiety, and here's a list of reasons why: -I'm unable to stop shaking after being around people I don't know too well (worse in crowds) and it is becoming easier for these people to notice. I was in music not long back, and it was to the point that my voice shook and I felt weak. It became worse when someone pointed this out. -I often find myself physically unable to talk at an appropriate volume, (I become really quiet and no one can really hear me) and- though less often- I'm unable to speak. This is extremely difficult as my teachers think that I'm not getting involved and therefore may not consider my chosen options like they consider others. I'm unsure if they do this, but they may think that that person works harder than [me] so we'll put that person in their preferred subject and consider [me] last. This also affects me in air cadets, where speaking is also a huge part of getting involved. -I get this weird feeling (which I'm guessing is anxiety) on my way to air cadets and during air cadets but not after. For some reason I feel relieved, even though air cadets is like family. The same with school, but school is definitely not like family. School is just a place for children to be targeted and put through tonnes of stress, for me. -I'm constantly worried, sometimes I don't even know what about. -I experience muscle tension almost all the time, which- I think- can be a sign of anxiety. -I have trouble sleeping, which is partly my mind racing through almost everything that makes me want to collapse and partly due to the face that whenever I close my eyes I see my Grandad's body/him suffering. (This is also something that I need advice on, it's horrible to see again) These things are really biting into my life, and I just need as much advice on this as possible. Thanks.
I'm sure this must be very difficult and debilitating, and probably even difficult to post and share. I'm glad you are able to talk about it, as that's the first step to working through it. The symptoms you describe are definitely consistent with anxiety. If this is something that is happening consistently over a fairly long period, then it is consistent with anxiety disorder. I would strongly suggest seeing a therapist. Depending on how severe it is, the therapist may recommend therapy, or using medication to get the anxiety under control and then work on the longer-term issues that are underlying it.
Are there any alternatives? I don't mean to be ignoring your advice, but I don't want my family to know, or anyone for that matter. It's private to me, so if my family found out it'd just make everything worse. Also, is my Mum right to be angry at my Dad for not wanting to go out for dinner with family, and then being unable to put together a sentence to explain why? It's always like this, my Mum getting angry at my Dad and my Dad unable to answer properly because my Mum is shouting at him and will get angry with whatever he says. I said it's because he thought that we were having tea here (which is probably why he declined) and my Mum shouts at me telling me not to answer for him. Am I in the wrong here?
After looking over my previous post I realised that I made a small mistake. I meant a way of doing this without parents finding out, rather than an alternative.
I'm including a link to the YoungMinds (UK) website for you FoxEars. As you will see, YoungMinds recommend seeking help along the lines of what Chip has already mentioned, but you can read the information and advice for yourself and check out the self help pages and factsheets. Anxiety - Anxiety in Children and Young People - YoungMinds
If nothing really helps, please consider seeing a doctor regarding medication. Really, in the long run it's the best thing. If you don't address it, it can manifest itself physically. That is, it can truly make you physically sick. I hate that there is such a stigma about getting help for a legitimate condition. Good luck.
I'm gonna have to end up talking to my parents about this, aren't I? Also, does anyone have advice on what I mentioned about my Grandad? I seriously haven't had a proper nights sleep since he went into the hospital. It's not calming things or whatever that I need, just something to get the image his body, coffin and out of my head :bang: :tears:
FOXEARS I think if telling ur parents will give you more stress....i you should hold off til seeing ur family doctor. I believe that is your best and safest step! The family doctor is confidential and your family doctor will have good resources. Maybe a therapist, maybe mediation? I seen a therapist for medication. With the my therapist help I was able to work threw my anxiety and fears without medication. Things to help til you get to your doctors. Get plenty of sleep..... if possible! cut out sugars, c affine, exercise and get support from friends. As a parent I would never be upset if my children where experiencing stress or anxiety. I would only want what was best for them as well I would respect if they wanted to keep it private, even from me.... No parent wants there child to be in distress or pain sinergy
Well, you know your parents better than I do, of course, but I totally believe in addressing problems like this, because living with them can be debilitating. Just understand that EVERYONE experiences anxiety. It's completely normal. However, when it interferes with you leading a happy, healthy life, there is a problem . Also, sometimes therapy might help, but often anxiety and/or depression are chemical in nature and medication is sometimes necessary.
Honestly I'm pretty sure that I can't even tell them. It took me a few+ months just to say about my eyesight, *grumbles about never becoming an RAF pilot*(seriously though I could've cried when I was told I was short sighted) I'm unsure if this is actually anxiety, and I don't think I'll be able to truly find out without my parents knowing. I'm not sure what it could be if it wasn't, though, as I remember my first day of cadets I was unable to form a word without stuttering. It's also holding me back, as it is harder to talk to anyone- including staff and staff cadets. (They'll probably begin to think that I'm not independent). I want this to end, but I don't know how to tell my parents. I don't even think that I CAN tell them.
I know this thread is fairly old, but I see no point in making a new one on the same topic. How do I tell my Mum about this? I don't just need what to say, I need to to actually be able to ask. I don't know how to do it, I just can't. I've tried but I've ended up changing the subject before even mentioning about anxiety. I can't even ask for small things how am I supposed to do this?
Try writing it down, maybe? That's always easiest for me. I have pretty bad anxiety too (although I'm getting better with treatment), so even normal conversations can be hard. Conversations like this are even harder. When I write things down though, I can really think about what I want to say and get everything out there without having my anxiety get in the way. That's how I came out to my mom too. Anything big really, I have to sit down and explain my feelings in a letter, otherwise I just can't get it out. Good luck with everything. I hope this opens doors for you to get treatment so your anxiety gets better. Living with anxiety is no fun.
That's actually a great idea. After telling my mum, and if she actually listens and decides that I need to go to someone for diagnosis or whatever, I'm not sure I'll be able to keep up with everything. School takes up way too much of my life, with added homework and extra revision for the end of year exams on top of that, I'm also juggling this with cadets and 4+ hours a week for Duke of Edinburgh. Should I wait rather than adding to my overpopulated schedule or would it be better to tell my parents now? My anxiety has definitely become worse over the past few months, and I'm really struggling. I'm unsure if telling my parents would be for better or worse.
It's hard to know the best answer for this one, since we can't see the future. I'm inclined to say that getting help sooner might be more beneficial though. Especially if you're at a particularly stressful point in your life. It might help you get through the stressful time instead of just getting worse. That being said, we can't really know how things play out until they do. I hope that whatever you decide to do, it works out well for you. I wish I could be more helpful.
As someone who suffers from general anxiety and social anxiety, you definitely do. It effected me so much when I was in high school that I developed an eating disorder, and when my mom found out, she got me a therapist. Speaking from my own personal experience, getting counselling was a huge help, not just for the disordered eating, but for my anxiety, which was the root of the problem anyway. I can't stress how much it helped me. My anxiety isn't gone, and it never will be. It's something that we have to live with for the rest of our lives. But getting the tools to help you fight it and control it is so important and has dramatically improved the quality of my own life.
