Breakup.

I'm not advising you to talk to a therapist because you had a breakup. I'm telling you to have a chat with a professional because the symptoms you describe warrant treatment. Plus you have admitted that you have depression. And your thinking patterns appear negative and harmful. Depression is sickness just like broken leg. You need to fix it.

Why don't you think the therapy is not the right option for you? What other options you have? Medicating yourself? Well, most likely you would have to keep medicating for the rest of your life. Staying miserable? Now is that something you really want to? Try alternative "medicine" quackery? Surely you don't want to waste your money on something that is not evidence based?

 

Omg that story made me teary-eyed. I'm so sorry to hear what happened to you. You need to remember that things will get better. It's always awkward talking to a good friend who is also your ex (atleast for me). Once this all blows over, I'm sure you'll find someone else. Try talking about it with someone you trust. It always makes you fell better to get stuff like this off of your chest.
Lots of hugs!

 

Well, I already explained a few reasons why the therapy might not have worked for you before. Sometimes things don't work on the first try but the solution is not to abandon your efforts but to try again.

Talking to a "stranger" a few hours a week is not going to suddenly fix your problems. It is a slow and effort taking process. In the beginning you might actually feel worse when you start processing your issues. However, after 2-6 months you should see a clear improvement.

Perhaps you should read a guide book to therapy and finding a therapist. I read one which was very good and informative. Unfortunately it is not available in English but there are bound to be number of similar books to choose from.

Talking to friends about your problems is not the solution. Sure, friends can be used for temporary support but your problems seem much more long-lasting. Relying (constantly) to your friends for emotional support puts huge strain on the friendship. This is the right place to talk about your problems.

 

Well, obviously if you cannot afford therapy at the moment then you cannot. However, have you researched different options for funding treatment? Since you are still a minor there might be some options for you that you have not considered.

For example, Affordable Care Act (aka Obamacare) includes extensive provisions for providing mental health and substance abuse treatment. Check with your school psychologist and parents what is covered.

If that route is blocked then the next best thing is to read up on depression and try to work on your issues that way. Also, many people find creative stuff such as writing and painting helpful. That's something you might also want to try. Once again your school psychologist should be able to help you to give you directions.