Yeah, I think I get it. You feel "male" or "female" at different times, but you are attracted to women either way... right?
YES! I've struggled all my life with my gender identity, but I've never felt *any* doubt at all that my attraction was to men. It's one of those things that's hard to explain sometimes.
I'm also pretty sure about my sexual orientation; I'm bisexual, about 60/40 in favor of women. My gender identity is another story. I'm not sure whether I'm more comfortable as a man or as a woman, but being in an awkward position in the middle feels really bad.
I identified as genderfluid for almost a year before coming to terms with the fact that i'm ftm. it was a "phase" for me but i know that for many people it isn't!! for me my fluidity was just about gender expression, not about my gender identity. for example, if i wore makeup and "girl clothes" i would call it a feminine day and if i wore a binder and "guy clothes" i would call it a boy day. i know that it's different for everyone but for me it was just a step to coming out as ftm. i still wear makeup on occasion but it's usually just to contour my face to look more masculine. i have a long wig and sometimes like wearing "girl clothes" however, i still identify as male because gender identity and the way you present yourself are two different things!
i'm pretty much with Hawk on this one. depending on the day, i can be any stripe on the genderfluid pride flag but it doesn't have any influence on my preference.
I hope its okay if I ask another question. I really like to try to understand people and the way they think. As a genderfluid person, do you actually consider yourself to be more than one gender? Or do you just feel like another gender sometimes? Or... okay I guess I just don't get how that works at all. From what I understand, "sex" is the state of your physical body, but "gender" is more like...psychological? Emotional? Okay, I confused myself... :eusa_doh:
A short description is that sex is what's between your legs and gender is what's between your ears. :icon_wink
Ha! Perfect! I am a simple girl, and I love a simple explanation. Thank you. <3 So, how does being genderfluid work then?
Sex is the fact that I have a vagina. My genderfuidity has to do with feeling like a boy trapped in a girl's body some days and feeling like a girl who wants to be a boy trapped in a girl's body other days. I don't know if that makes sense but for me it has to do with being aware of my mental "sex". For me though it also has to do with my body because I LOVE masculine everything, even on the days that I feel a little more "girl". I feel like Pinocchio who wants to be a real boy Where's my fairy? But this stuff is a little different for every genderfluid person, because the way everyone sees themself is pretty unique. Hope I answered the question.
You certainly gave me a better understanding of the internal struggle that genderfluid people go through. I just hope it is not always uncomfortable or painful. I hope that you find some enjoyment or satisfaction out of it sometimes...
I sometimes enjoy it, because I feel less restricted as to what I can and can't do in regards to gender. It is like a blessing and a curse; it has its own pros and cons. Sorry to make it sound so bleak XD Though I feel like more of an exception because I'm hoping to eventually go full-on male.
I pretty much feel the same way Mr. Spock. Actually it's quite on the nose. It is...Logical... LOL Sorry but I HAD to! XD Anyway, There are some masculine things that I do not care for, but there are more feminine things that I do not care for. I think gender is more a state of mind than anything else. The body certainly does not define this one bit. For GenderFluid peoples I believe that they wish to be both, and they do not feel the boundaries of being kept to one or the other. Because, really. Why SHOULD we?? A gender does not define you as a person, but it could be just a way to describe how we feel, because we've put the label of "girl" or "boy" things to give it meaning and definition. Like, if I said that I wanted to paint my nails, then you would assume that's something that a "Girl" likes to do. But what if I just like painting my nails from time to time, because I like to draw and paint and be creative? It's not because you feel like a "girl" it's because you just like it, simple as that, gender doesn't compute at all. That's kinda how I felt my whole life. I liked what I liked and hated what I hated, I didn't think or care of the implications of my gender or anything, but I've always kinda remained more neutral than anything else. Anyways, that's just what I think, I know everyone is different.
I'm pretty new to the whole -being- genderfluid thing. I've only identified that way a few months, though the patterns of fluctuation are lifelong. I knew about it before I knew I was it, so I have the basics. I just don't know how to be myself yet, so I'd very much like to talk. I'm struggling currently because I woke up two days ago feeling overwhelmingly male in my short, high-pitched, curvy, conciliatory physical form. I feel like there's so much in my way before I could ever get someone to treat me like the guy I want to be. Like my voice would be deeper if I took hormones, but then I'd lose the female characteristics I like about myself most days. I could be more forthright, but I already get backlash for being too bold as a girl. There's no way to compress my butt down to a masculine size, chest binding makes my breasts ache badly (I do it anyway tho). I can do my best to present male, but I feel like I can only ever fake it. Like I'll never be "real" and the things I could do to become "real" would make it so I could never be a "real" girl again. And I know that I don't have to be binary, that I'm already a real human being, that I already exist and I'm already justified and valid in my existence. I know the spiel. I just don't feel it.
I'm fairly new to the term myself but have always had a sense of being a female trapped in a male's body. There is that plus to gender fluidity in that if I need to present masculine, I can do so and vice versa (feeling / dressing like a girl), depending on who I'm around and how I feel that day. I find comfort in that knowing I probably will not transition. It still doesn't affect who I'm attracted to. I'm attracted to beautiful people. Beautiful on the inside, first. Outside, second.
I mean... I'm on the bi spectrum. So for me, sometimes I'm a gay guy, sometimes I'm a straight guy, sometimes I'm a gay girl and sometimes I'm a straight girl. And sometimes I'm inbetween or something. My sexuality doesn't have to do with my gender, but I find for me personally it often fits into the same time frames. So if I'm a guy for an hour, my orientation will usually- usually stay sort of consistent within that hour. But hey, idk. Genderfluid is hard to understand. Sometimes I don't think I understand it myself.
I can't speak for other people who are gender fluid either, but even though I'm bi I feel my orientation sort of shifts when the gender stuff does. General pattern is I'm more attracted to the same gender to what I'm experiencing. I feel like my sexuality is just as fluid as my gender tbh. Although I've read that gender and sexuality aren't linked, so I'm not sure if there are many others that experience this. Depends. Sometimes. Sometimes not. That's like... as far as I understand it too. :lol:
Are you implying being gender fluid is not valid? Just asking. I don't get confused about it. I've always presented a little on the femme side but yesterday, my clothing was androgynous and everything was monochrome. I felt neither male or female, so label-wise, I was white on the flag. But the label-thing is a bit overwhelming. Label me non-binary, too. Agender? Sometimes. There's probably 10 pride flags that apply to me. I don't care for labels. I just want to be who I am and be accepted. Don't we all? (&&&)
