Do you think it's even possible? I believe that people who think they're fine with lesbians, but not gay men tend to invalidate and fetishize lesbians. I think gay men and lesbians are equally accepted. Lesbians just get false acceptance.
Yea it's definitely possible. You see them more common in ignorant straight men. You know, the ones that like fantasize themselves in their intimate moments in between them? Yea....., I'm pretty sure it possible with women. I like to think anything's possible in this world.
I think the people who think like that are the same people who think men are macho and that a man should be the dominate one so if two guys have sex they are "dominating each other" and that's not okay and wrong by their standards. Whereas they think for lesbians, they're both girls and submissive so it doesn't matter what they do. Because, you know, it's totally these peoples' business what other people are doing with their bodies and with each other.
I've heard people criticize the term "lesbophobia" because it's common for people to be accepting of lesbians but not gay men, but the other way around is rare. So it makes no sense to have the term "lesbophobia" specific to females but not one specific to males. I'm sure a lot of people who are "okay" with lesbians are only so because it arouses them (as you said). Man who masturbates to lesbian porn kicks son out of house for being gay? Not unheard of. I agree that lesbians get a lot of false acceptance, but there are people who genuinely support lesbians but not gay men. There are countries in the world where female homosexuality is legal, but male is not.
I've seen women fetishize gay men but be grossed out by lesbians, though it's not as common as straight men fetishizing lesbians but being grossed out by gay men. My brothers and dad are perfect examples of that.
Many guys around me (ahem... not my friends, they are awesome ) fetishize lesbian women. And it's plain annoying. And I don't know about elsewhere but where I stay/guys I know sterotype lesbians as "hot" or more attractive. Straight guys fetishize lesbians just as they hate gay men. That does not imply that those straight dudes accept lesbians. They are grossed out by lesbians as they are grossed out by gay guys, somehow it's alright if they fetishize lesbians but hate them in real life. Misogynist hypocrites :dry: And don't get me started on straight girls I don't understand why they would want to go shopping with a gay guy?! There is this girl who I'm out to, once I complimented her on her long sleeved tshirt and she goes,"Huh, don't worry I'll let you wear it." WTF?!
I feel like for many people who feel that way, it's not even acceptance of lesbians. It's more like, "I don't really care what they do because it doesn't affect me and lesbian sex is hot." They feel like if it's with guys, it's not okay because as I said before they feel like guys need to be macho and homosexual sex doesn't concur with that in their minds and they feel like it's their responsibility to express their discuss for it. If it doesn't do anything for them, then it's just gross. Maybe they feel to some extent like (for example if this were a homophobic male saying that) gay men undermine their own macho manliness that they've built up. Since they view homosexual sex between males as "unmanly" and wrong, then they feel like if other men do it then it takes away from their own manliness/ego/pride by association if that makes sense. So they feel the need to protect the manliness of men. I'm probably not explaining this well. ---------- Post added 11th Jan 2016 at 11:13 PM ---------- They like lesbians as sexual objects but don't like them as real life people.
I've actually met people who said "hey, the Bible doesn't say anything about lesbians". They said this after going on a big homophobic rant against gay males. This isn't only a one time thing, either. People really fetishize lesbians while at the same time spreading hate against gay males. These are some of the biggest hypocrites I've ever met in my life.
I've seen a lot of this. I know a lot of people at school who are like that. However, I will say that it goes the other way too. From what I can tell it's typically straight guys who are okay with lesbians but not gay men. As someone who primarily hangs out with girls, though, there are a ridiculous amount of straight women who hate and are grossed out by lesbians. And again, most of them are fine with gay men. I feel like both might have to do with fetishizing the opposite gender, but it could be something else. It's all so stupid.
I have also noticed that some people, often straight cis-men, are "ok" with me (a transguy) but then they start speaking ill of transwomen. I think it's a part of the same sick phenomenon. Often those people confuse gender with sexuality too. They don't really understand the difference between a cisgender homosexual and a transperson. They don't really respect anyone who is not cis and straight. LGBT+ folks get hated or fetishized depending on how attractive they are to a straight cis-man.
Yes. Very possible. Growing up, a major difference between the way I perceived non-American gay culture vs American gay culture, was that I would always immediately think when looking at American culture "that's not progressive, that's just horny men excusing girls being slutty!".
I've known straight girls who are fine with gay guys, but don't like lesbians. I think there are also a lot of straight men who are fine with their porn fueled fantasy of lesbians, but aren't so accepting of actual lesbians. In general, I think women's sexuality isn't taken that seriously by a lot of men and lesbian's even less so, so it's not a threat to them.
Lesbophobia isn't just about homophobia, but also the misogyny that causes it. It got It's secondary term since lesbians are a double minority that don't fit within the single categories with either gay men (homophobia) or straight women (sexism). The one thing to keep in mind is that lesbians aren't really discriminated against for loving women, they are hated for not liking men. I mean sure, as you said, there are people who find lesbian sex hot, It's not illegal, etc, but when that same person says "I don't like men", the men who fetishize us are more likely to get violent or sexually abusive- it very greatly angers them. It's more accurate to say that straight people "support" female bisexuality, rather than lesbianism, since it gives men the two terms of what he wants ("hot lesbian sex" + "being available to him sexually). That being said, female bisexuals aren't fully supported either, just fetishized. But saying people genuinely support lesbians is false. There are people who genuinely support lesbian sex and relationships yes (most of this applies to straight women who are acting/experimenting btw, not true lesbians), but none of them support the right to be unattracted to men.
Well, in Highschool, it was common for lesbian couples to kiss in public. As for gay males, I never heard of a single gay male in all my highschool years. Mostly, in those years, people just didn't care about lesbians since girls can do whatever. But, gay guys? Nah, they're considered too feminine or something. However, I don't know if it's really possible to be accepting of lesbians while rejecting homosexual males as too feminine. I'm not in their head, so I couldn't confirm this. Though, I could say that this is a rampant thing.
The same ones who say this are probably also the same ones who come onto lesbians, propose threesomes, and don't view lesbianism as something inborn, but rather, a "choice" women make to their advantage. Plenty of homophobic women exist, but they're not nearly so open with it. I've rarely heard of straight women beating or murdering lesbians or gay men, for example. Their ego isn't so vested in their sense of femininity and they're allowed a greater freedom of expression. I've also heard of straight men say they're not into female-female action, or turned off by it (or lesbians, bisexual women), but they seem to be a minority. Ironically, their own sexuality is questioned by not being enthusiastic about it! When plenty of straight women go on about how disgusting they think two men together is, how they'd never date or have sex with a bisexual man, or that "what sane man would prefer hairy man ass to a vagina?"