Forever Alone

I try not to think about it, but I'm worried I'll never find a gay man who will want to marry me, have kids and all...

You're not alone on this one mate.

 

Yeah, I worry about it. I feel like I don't deserve a good partner, despite pouring my heart out to anyone that I am close to. We'll see.

 

I have definitely thought about that. Due to low esteem & being very shy & socially awkward I guess. Meeting someone that genuinely likes me and wants to stick with me just seems really unlikely.

 

I'm shy as well, and between having kids and working all the time, doesn't leave much time left to work on meeting anyone.

 

I will be alone, for the rest of my life.

No this isn't pessimism. It is a fact that I have been struggling to accept for many years, but is simply the truth. It's not that I've given up or dejectedly lost hope, not that. Only I believe that some human beings are just incompatible with others, and I happen to be one of them.

I'm proud of it.

 

I wouldn't usually admit it but I think I worry about that way too much too. Im not good at talking to people anyway and usually I'm too nervous to find out if someone actually even likes girls let alone me in particular and then even if I did find someone I worry that I have too may issues to trust that they will always be there.

However it would seem that the world is more full of lonely people than any of us realise, maybe that is a good thing if we are all just looking for someone.

 

I have felt like that from time to time, but if it happens I'm willing to get a puppy and put a lot of my efforts into my career.

 

No, I'm not worried, because I have absolutely no desire for a relationship, or for marriage, or especially for kids. I'm perfectly content being by myself.

 

I'm a depressed, annoying, self-absorbed fag, after all. Why would there ever be anyone out there that'd even want a one-night stand with me, much less a relationship?

So yeah, I worry about it.

 

Wow, wow, wow, calm down mate. I know exactly how you're feeling trust me, but avoid these kind of thoughts as much as possible. Please.

 

Yes, sometimes, like I worry I'll start going out with someone and it'll be great and then I'd find out they think ''All X are Z because they are X'' and call me a bigot if you want but I can't date people who are prejudice. Or I'll worry that I can't have kids because the adoption agency says they ''don't discriminate on gender or transgender'' but mentioned nothing about people who don't have a gender. [I'm from UK if anybody knows something about this]. Other stuff too, but I have an imaginary girlfriend who is amazing and four lovely kids, so, you know, if real life fails.

But then on other days I'm okay about not having a partner or kids. Partners can cause too much difficulty, mainly because I'm difficult, and the fact you have to give kids pretty much everything they want - since when? That wasn't the rule when I was younger, wasn't allowed a phone 'till I was 11 [high school] but now if you don't get one for a 2 year old you're suddenly a bad parent. I'd rather not deal with that.

 

Until this year I was convinced this was my fate. Things change, though, and no matter how bleak it seems I don't think anyone is really forever alone.

 

I am accepted that I would probably be alone for my life.
Not being pessimistic, but simply I think it's better not to worry about being alone.
It is something that bothered me a while ago, but I have realized that there's no point worrying about it.

 

I don't think it's really realistic to think I'd find a partner that easily. Trying to find a gay guy who would actually date me is like trying to find a needle in a haystack.

...Finding another trans guy as a partner is like trying to find one needle in five haystacks...

So do I fear being alone? Ehhh. It doesn't really seem that bad, I prefer being alone most of the time. I can only hang out with friends for so long before I want to be left alone again. I like my friends, but I'm just introverted. I don't want to get married or have kids, either. So having a partner seems kinda iffy to me.

 

I'm 38 years old this year and I worry a lot about loneliness and not getting that wife that I dream about. I mean I do have PTSD and anxiety issues as well but they don't hundred percent affect me in the fact that I couldn't have a spouse on which that I would love and adore for always. Sometimes I wonder if my atheism has a play in that as well considering I have been one for 18 years now. But I don't worship Satan or anything crazy of that nature.

 

Yes I do feel that way. Even started the same topic about myself quite recently. There are plenty of gay men out there who want to shag me, but very few who want to actually talk to me and get to know me. And I don't like casual hookups. so yeah, I'm gonna be alone for a long time yet.

 

I'm sure that everyone who thinks they'll be alone throughout their lives are convinced of that. Believe me, it can all change before you know it.
Usually when you least expect it to, so don't lose faith so readily.

 

It's something I've worried about before, but not as much now. I'm currently single and I feel like I will be for a while, only because I don't want a relationship right now.

Do I get moments when I feel lonely and I desperately want someone? Sure, but I feel like it comes from a primal desire for sex than companionship, lol.

 

Pfft, no of course I don't worry.

Spoiler

ok that was a lie, I totally freaking do. But there's time yet... right?