What are you thinking?

I work at a rather infamously sexy fashion brand now, and this morning I saw all of the district managers getting a tour of the corporate office as I was leaving the office, I work the night shift currently. These DM's were a group of about 40 Greek gods. Like, let me tell you..I have never seen so many perfect looking people at one time before in my life. I don't consider myself unattractive, I'm told that I'm good looking/cute on a pretty regular basis by loads of people, and in the minute it took them to cross the street they made me feel like a hideous troll. So I hit the gym immediately after I got home and banged out a few miles on the treadmill, worked up a good sweat. And I just finished a 12 hour shift. So..feeling both really good and fucking terrible simultaneously, mentally and physically. 24 more hours to go and then I have four days off. Yay.

 

I really should just get used to being lonely by now. I'm tired of getting my hopes up.

 

I'll probably be hitting thirty or something before I find a stable relationship. These crushes I've been having aren't getting me anywhere.

 

I want to hit people in the head with frying pans

 

would anything actually be different if I was out...or would it be the same.

 

I brought a stray kitten in about two weeks ago, posted some pics of her. <3

 

Today is a good day.

At about this time, a year ago, myself and my friends were marching down the Chausee de Charleroi, in a three man wide column, several ranks deep, and spearheaded by a golden eagle.

Drums were hammering left and right, and our feet fell in tune with the quick time pace. A few of the guys were singing along to the sound of fifes, ignoring just how heavy our guns weighted on our shoulder.

I remember the cars stopped beside us, and kids poked their heads out the windows to smile and wave at us. Some would park their cars for a few moments, get out and start taking pictures.

I bet our blue uniforms, tall black hats and impeccable formation impressed them.

We then reached the battlefield. A large plot of farmland, with crops that rose up to your waist, and bugs that flew all around us as we marched across.

All three thousand of us gathered on the southern end, each regiment and battalion organised into three battle groups, and commanded by pompous, frilly dressed generals atop magnificent horses.

And then, surrounded by his Imperial Guard, there he was. In his short statured magnificence, sitting confidently on his Arabian horse and wearing his trademarked bicorne, was Napoleon.

He rode before us with his mounted guardsmen, and every man present cheered and yelled his name. Vive l'Empereur, we screamed.

About an hour later, and with dark clouds looming in the horizon, a loud thunder broke the silence. Then another, and another, in a deafening cacophony of deadly fire.

The cannons roared the call to battle, and we would not be found wanting.

 

Yep. I just did a voice recording and I sound like absolute garbage. It looks like my height wasn't the only thing I got stiffed on.

 

I feel good today.

 

Apparently, Germaine Greer has a history of pedophilia...

 

Starting to wonder when Oregairu is going to be finished. Maybe I'll have to wait another 2 years, like for the 2nd season.

 

Doesn't surprise me one bit. She's a transphobic piece of shit.

--

It's actually a good thing I work today. Being kinda depressed, it makes me feel useful at least.

 

Soon I'll be off to the next dissapointment... Polishing my shields & etc already...

Isn't life nice...

 

Why do I feel so irrelevant? Why do I feel like I don't belong?
Is there anyone to comfort me?

 

I'm kicking myself for not getting into Judas Priest sooner.

 

Don't worry: we couldn't all have been born in 1950. :lol:

 

What an episode of Game of Thrones!!!

 

Smash Bros is so exciting!

 

Alright, wish me luck. I'm making eggplant parmigiana. (for the love of god, let this turn out)

 

No one replys... I'm so not doing well. But it doesn't matter.