Congrats on coming out to some especially you mum. I hope the first people I come out to will show the same acceptance. I think if my mom was still around she'd be one of the first I'd tell. Mother's are protective, maybe that's what's driving her or she now has to deal with it too and doesn't want to engage dad with the new reality; still processing it all. At any rate it sounds like she may be your champion going forward. Wishing you the best.
Thanks SiennaFire. I just want to be accepted for being me. I've already decided that I won't lie about it if it comes up in conversation so, you're right, it shouldn't give anyone any power over me (though I'm a long way off wanting to be out at work which is a whole different kettle of fish). It's good to air my thoughts so thanks for reading and replying.
Glad I could help. I'm also glad that you won't lie about your sexuality if it comes up in conversation. It's very liberating to eliminate the secrecy around your sexuality ride: I have a slightly different perspective on this. I want to be me and have in my life the people who accept me for being me. This is a subtle difference that minimizes the impact of being held hostage by someone's disapproval. Food for thought. Hope you enjoyed your night out with friends.
Thanks SiennaFire. It goes without saying, I'll only have the people in my life that accept me for being me and I don't expect that to be any different from the people I have in my life now. If it is, I'll be happy to replace them with more accepting people. I'm already thinking about how I can add a few gay friends to my social circle. My night out was great. I haven't laughed so much in a long time. I'm just home and ready to go to bed. Thanks again for your input.
It was great reading over this. I hope you keep building your confidence (you're inspiring me to build mine)!
Time for an update! This forum was such a help to me through my coming out process so I wanted to drop by and update some other users about my journey. I came out to my mum in December. I'm still not out to my dad due to his illness (at my mum's request, which I have to respect; she'll tell me when the time is right). I'm now out to a total of 6 family/friends and I have a partner! I'm so happy right now that I want anyone who is where I was 6 months ago to know, it does get better! I read and heard so many people saying that before but couldn't believe it but I've met a guy that I've been dating for a month and I'm really happy. He's the first partner I've had in about 18 years and it just feels right when we are together. It shouldn't work as we don't even live in the same country but we've spent three weekends together, chat everyday on FaceTime and have our next three weekends planned. If you're hesitating about the whole coming out process I hope you take somthing from my story. It took me 20+ years to accept myself for being gay. Now, I don't really care what anyone else thinks. I'm not 100% out but I'm comfortable in my own skin so I'm ok with that.
