1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

I Was Forced out of the Closet

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by Spiritqueen, Sep 22, 2015.

  1. Spiritqueen

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2015
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    ATL
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Family only
    So, I've never actually came out to anyone before. My parents know i'm gay but thats because I was pretty much forced out. I was planning on telling them right before I left for college that way:
    A) I would be complety sure of my sexuality and
    B) it would be the safest time bc I would be living on campus (though my parents are very tolerant better safe than sorry)

    However, last year around this time I got a new phone and my mom(being the overcontrolling parent she is) went through it and pretty much found that I liked girls.

    Fortunately she wasn't upset or anything. I was pretty much horrified but my mom told me that I should be "relieved" and happy to "get that chip off my shoulders".

    Its almost been a year but we haven't really talked about it since. For all she and my father knows im bisexual bc they only know that I like girls and not that Im a lesbian..( I'm pretty sure my dad thinks im bi because he always makes stupid jokes about me having a boyfriend)

    I haven't talked to them about it with them because im still a little sore about the whole thing and there hasn't been a good moment to bring it up.
     
  2. Acanthophis

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2013
    Messages:
    33
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    An Island in Canada
    Gender:
    Male
    Out Status:
    A few people
    That sucks - it must be annoying working up the nerve to tell somebody something personal only for them to find out themselves. Hey, at least they're tolerant, so you definitely dodged a bullet there.
     
  3. GreenPanRose270

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2015
    Messages:
    77
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    NJ
    I absolutely hate it when parents pull fast ones like that. It's why I back up my texts to Google Drive and then delete them after I come out to someone.
    At least they were accepting...my parents are of the traditional type and they'd probably disown me if they found out I was contemplating my sexuality at such a "young age", let alone that I'm pan and have a crush on a girl...
    Good luck in college and in the future!
     
  4. guitar

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,062
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Southern Ontario, Canada
    That's tough when parents go through your private stuff and discover things like that. I'd gone it hard to trust them. My brother and sister and law went through my Facebook PM's when I was out one day and found messages between my first boyfriend & I before I was out. That really pissed me off but their intentions weren't mean, they'd heard things through the grapevine and wanted to know. They were supportive so I forgive them but still.

    If you need to talk, hit up my wall. (*hug*)
     
  5. Biker boy

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2015
    Messages:
    135
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    third rock from the sun
    Gender:
    Male
    My mom found out when I was younger she found two gay porn tapes and a mag under my bed...good place to hide things huh wait what she doing under my bed anyways...oh well she told my sister asked me why I had that so I told her I was...that's what I said I was hahaha she told me it was just a faze she didn't talk to me directly for a couple of weeks and did a lot of staying in her room but then things went back to normal like if nothing happened we don't talk about it we kept it from my dad but know they all know for sure but no one talks about it like for them if you don't face it its just not true.. Sometimes mom will say I guess I'll get no grandchildren from out of the blue or even say I wanted to hook you up with so and so's daughter you would be good together.. It don't bother me I let her have her dreams lol
     
  6. FlyingBoats

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2015
    Messages:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Somewhere in the Caribbean
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    All but family
    My experience was completely different.

    I was forced to come out to my mom around three months ago (by then, only my grandmother knew, and she was very accepting). I'd been writing a letter I would give to her before I left for college, because it would be safer and I would've been able to articulate my feelings better.

    She walked in when I was working on the letter, and basically forced me to tell her what it was about. And it's been hell since that.
    She took away my phone and any sort of communication I had with the world. I was getting to know someone and I haven't been able to talk to her since, or even see my
    phone. The passive-aggressiveness (or just overall aggressiveness) and lack of communication about the subject have been particularly painful.

    I truly wish others have such a positive response from their parents. My only hope is that I'll be away for college in a few months.