Have you ever been told to "Toughen Up"?

I'm not a tough boy at all, I remember crying over some really random stuff like when I lost anything I would cry. I was never told to toughen up ever. I was teased a lot though, I guess cute Justin was a target.

 

Actually, all the time. I know I should. My anxiety kinda gets hard for me to deal with sometimes. It drives me completely nuts when my partner tells me this. Well excuse me that I don't have a Xanax prescription. But at least I try to do something when I spazz out.

 

I really empathise with guys when it comes to this! I feel really bad for guys when people just expect them to be ''tough'' and not show emotion. Like wtf we're all human! If I ever have a son I'll make damn sure he embraces his emotions.. Nothing good can come from bottling up emotions! Believe me I know this! And if he has even a drop of my personality in him he won't handle bottling things up for long! He will likely break a lot of shit in the house. Lucky the front door window was the only thing that copped a beating from me when I bottled stuff up! I have a scar on my hand to this day to prove it.

Down to the point.. Everyone has the right to be vulnerable sometimes! Male or Female x

 

Good point. I had a shit ton of anger when I was younger and a lot of crap ended up breaking. There were a lot of things I had on my mind that I never shared with anyone because I didn't want to burden people with my problems. There were times when I would get so angry that I would just end up crying - but crying is something I never do in front of other people, on the very few occasions that I actually have since the age of 12 (mostly teary eyes rather than full-on blubbering).

I'm not sure how effective sharing my problems would have been at curbing my anger, but it might have helped.

 

Yes, when I was little. Now I don't really share my emotions or problems with anyone, so not anymore. Except when I tell it to myself, which happens quite often.

 

Aw! God dammit you sound like me here.. But that is so sad! I had a psychologist myself.. But I didn't see them often enough and to begin with I couldn't talk to them much (trust issues) but yeah.. Sorry you were like that! I reckon having someone to talk to definitely would have helped.

There is this guy I know and his mothers crematorium funeral thing was on the day before yesterday and I remember seeing him crying like mad! He's only like 17 and has lost his mother to cancer the poor thing.. He made me cry! I gave him and his brothers and father a hug at the end because I could not imagine losing my mother let alone love of my life

 

I've always had good pain tolerance, so I was never told to toughen up in the physical sense.

Emotionally, however.. :lol: I've mentioned this before on here, but my dad often yelled at me in public settings, which would get me bawling like nothing else. And then he'd tell me to toughen up which would make me cry even more, as I'd disappointed him. Eventually I did toughen up though, so that's great

Somewhat ironically, now he chastises me for being impervious

 

That's sooo mean... I'll have to write an angry blog post!!1! Or at least I will when my fave bitching website comes out of maintenance mode *first world problems* :lol:

 

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"Don't cry like a little girl"

My mom to me when I broke my thumb.

Thanks mom you sexist mysogonistic bitch...

 

Is she really a sexist misogynistic bitch? If so I hope she gets hit real hard.

 

Yes, when I was afraid to do something(as an adult), my mom often would say and still says, "Be a man." It really bothered me and still bothers me. I'm empathetic and intuitive, so I feel like I have to have some comfort in doing things. If I sense something will not go my way, I behave differently. My BS detector works pretty good.

 

This has never happened to me because my family is sensitive so it's okay to cry.

 

Yes, I've heard "man up" before, from friends. Luckily my family is not the type who would ever say something like that to me.

 

"Man-up" version 1 meaning: start acting like DA MEN, cue dramatic chest thumping. I got told this by, ironically, women and somewhat feminine men.

"Man-up" version 2 meaning: "How many times have you bitched about this? Find a solution or shut up", usually told by me. I have no problem listening to other people's sob stories. But after months of hearing the same things delivered in the same manners? Shut the hell up.

 

So much great input... I wove you guys :'3 ♥

 

I have been told to toughen up and in my case it helped. I was a whiny kid

 

What? Does no one else follow the Swanson code? :lol:

 

Many times, I have Social Anxiety.. so I'm kinda awkward.. & some people mistake my quietness for weakness, I don't like hearing that word "Toughen Up" sometimes, but I understand, we live in a cruel world.. & sometimes, everyone isn't always a nice person; doesn't mean it doesn't offend sometimes.