I've had a few instances recently where I've been talking to people who are not aware that I am Gay because I am not that confident with my sexuality right yet. They tend to be older men that are quite typically straight, alpha lads and don't have much thought or consideration for how they express their views. Being a gay liberal guy I find their views quite disgusting the way they talk about Women or LGBT people. For example recently one guy asked if there were any women in the place I was working or if it was all men, and I said yes, and they said what's she like, and not wanting to go down the route of trying to objectify her, I just said she's nice, pretty confident in herself. Then they said she must be a lesbian, then went on about how she just hadn't been shown a good time... etc... the normal nonsense. I found it really offensive, but I really don't know how to deal with situations like this when they come up. I am a pretty sensitive person, I am easily hurt and upset, and I am strongly for diversity but I hate that I don't speak up, but I would also not want to put myself in a position of outting myself to people that frankly don't need to know, and would make my life difficult. Am I worrying too much, what do you folks do?
I use to take the aggressor role and just punch people in the face, too much testosterone in me I guess? I'm also pretty muscular so that never ended well, but I'll tell you this they never disrespected anything LGBT around me again Haha ....don't do what I did These days I just make it straight and clear that I don't tolerate homophobia and if they inquire for a reason I tell them cause it's effing bigot and intolerant, what other reason do they need? I also don't care if that puts them in direct suspicion that I'm gay but that may very well be your problem.
Well, for me, I dealt with homophobia in two ways. The first way was to make myself talk about being bisexual in more of a joking manner, like, "Hahaha, I'm bisexual, it's no big deal." The other was through my writing of my books. This was also how I got myself to come out myself. See, I wrote a character who is in the worst position possible for him: being a closeted gay with homophobic friends. With the help of another character, he's able to finally come out to his friends, who only abandon him for a short time, until they realize how much of a good friend he was to them before he came out of the closet, and they go back to being his friends. When I was writing this for my book, I mainly wrote it to help myself adjust to my changing viewpoint about myself, and I grew a little bit of thicker skin towards the homophobic crowd and was able to come out to my parents as well.
To be clear these aren't friends who I want to come out to or anything, I wouldn't call them friends if they were... They are just random people I've met as neighbours to my business premises.
Lmao! I like you already :lol: okay so violence isn't the answer but I can't help but praise you right now. Smack dem homophobes
(My brotha) Honestly, this is my initial response. But I try my hardest to not be physical because Well that can put you in JAIL :lol: So I usually just mouth off instead. I wouldn't recommend that route either, partially because it just makes people mad. IMO The best way to handle things is to be firm, not necessarily rude, but you don't have to be 'nice' either! IMO you don't have to be 'nice' to disrespectful people. You don't have to be a jackass back, but you can be firm and blunt. E.g "She must be a lesbian" Your answer could be "I'm not sure if you're aware, but the definition of a lesbian is a female who is attracted to females, not someone who works in (field)" And if they explain that it was a joke, or that only lesbians like "male" fields, just keep straightfacing your way out. Make em frustrated. It may not change their mind- that's pretty hard with bigoted shitheads, but if nothing else, maybe you won't have to listen to the stupid things they have to say anymore. Also feel free to tell anyone who makes rape jokes that they should be on a sex offender list, because they really should. Don't be afraid to tell them they're disgusting. Just shoot em down. Perfectly acceptable to be rude here. But just remember, if they don't like your views and opinions, maybe they'll leave you alone! (we can only hope :rolle And if they don't, tell them to fuck off like to hell with em
