Do you think people who say straight pride are ignorant?

The "culture" is so much more than that tho. I think I understand your point and once had a similar mindset. I don't present as a "stereotype", gay people as they are most often depicted on TV, movies and even in reality situations from pride parades to the lgbt people that have been on reality TV or even those that are most prominently interviewed have never mirrored who I am or how I feel.

And for awhile that played heavily on my mind, that if I came out people would just jump to the assumption that I was "one of those stereotypes". The thing that I eventually realized was that the "stereotypes" that were so often represented were those that didn't have the "luxury" of being able to blend in to society like I had, they were often forced out many before they were ready or had even come out to themselves because of mannerisms, behaviour that was natural to them...rather than be ashamed of it they found away to "own it" and honour themselves for the truth of who they are.

The more people that can "blend" in easily to society that come out be it atheletes, actors or regular folks the more people will see that while the "stereotypes" do have a deserving place in the community they are not the whole community. As a community we are as unique and diverse as the rest of humanity and that is something that is also celebrated during pride.

 

The issue I'm seeing here is that you keep equating your personal experience of just a couple of Pride events in your area (based on things you've said in other posts) with some universal truth about how millions of people are or behave.

In point of fact, by engaging in this behavior your are essentially doing the same thing (just in the other direction) as the people you describe as trying to tell you that you're not gay because you don't fit whatever stereotype or image they have in their mind about what being gay is. You are saying that because you've had a bad experience with some gay people that therefore their attitudes must be representative of all gay people everywhere.

That is both untrue and illogical. Rather than trying to pigeonhole all of us based on one aspect of ourselves, why don't you try treating people as individuals and judge them by the content of their individual character instead?

As far as changing your reality...what exactly is stopping you from changing it in any number of ways?

Todd

---------- Post added 8th Jul 2015 at 02:07 PM ----------

It's not a matter of being proud of something that is. It's a matter of refusing to be ashamed of it.

Todd

 

I cannot change what other people think. I live in South Florida, kind of known for being superficial. I've tried to treat people as individuals but every time I end up being disappointed because they end up just like the people before me. I try to talk about my interests, something other than celebrities, music artists and fashion, but no one wants any of that. I had to fake it a couple times just to feel like belong there. It's the same way online, I have to create a false self just to fit in. To me it seems pride is not about accepting what you are but what they think you are.

 

Demonstrably not true - people change other people's minds all the time, even if only a little bit. Besides, how is what other people think your reality?

If you don't like it where you live - move.

Have you tried this here? I glanced back through your posts, but didn't find any examples of you really treating anyone as an individual or discussing your interests. But perhaps I just missed those posts since I was in a hurry - if so, please provide links to them here. What are your interests, exactly?

I don't think I've ever had a conversation about celebrities, music artists, or fashion with anyone, gay or straight. Unless you count discussions of appropriate and economical clothes for work. Otherwise, I don't really care about these things and I can't think of any of my LGBT friends or associates, either now or when I was your age, who much cared about them either.

So which self are we dealing with here? If it's not the real you, why not try showing us that you and see how it works out?

I'm not in the business of worrying about other people's acceptance, so no - your characterization of pride is not accurate. Sorry.

Todd

 

I enjoy nature and the outdoors. I love the water and the beach, usually I go to see how much wildlife I can spot. I am absolutely fanatical about insects and reptiles, mostly insects and have a membership to Butterfly world. I read Nature to catch up on the latest scientific discovering, but I also enjoy philosophy and throwing around a lot of what ifs. I'm a big nerd and usually into anime, fighting games and trading cards. I'm so in love with animals I talk to them. I like to sit from a high place and watch the world go by. I love the night though, the way darkness just blends everything with the moon overlooking us.

That's just to name a few but like I have said, people don't want to hear about that side of me. They want to know what I think so and so on some reality show or some singer. Maybe some aspect of "gay" culture. I'm not interested in any of that. It's dull to me.

 

I have to say this is, for me, by far the most interesting post I've seen from you. This makes you seem like someone that a person could talk to. Like Todd I'm not sure I've ever really had a full fledged discussion about reality stars or fashion or whatever with anyone, not really my thing nor are they major interests of most of the gay people I know. I have on the other hand laid around reading the play someone's writing or reading their comic book collection or going over postcards and pictures from their travels. I've spent a lot of time talking philosophy and religion with other gay guys over coffee or even more animated discussions over drinks--my degrees are in religious studies. While I am not myself a big nature person--which frankly always makes me feel like there's something fundamentally unpoetic about me--a lot of the gay guys I know are and to be honest I know more gay people who are big animal people than I do straight people. I don't know what this "gay culture" it is that you've encountered but it's not anything that I've ever really found over my twenty years out and about in the gay community and to be honest while I've kind of understood from your other posts why you wouldn't fit in with the gay people I know, this post makes me think you'd fit in just fine.

 

Nifty! I grew up in Alaska, so we had wildlife all over the place. It was normal for moose to walk through the school playground and one summer night a grizzly killed one of our goats. When I was small, my mom and I lived in Washington state, which has a lot of both insects and snakes. We used to do nature hikes and if we came across a garter snake, she'd pick it up and then let me hold it. Although, one day we found out they can exude a really noxious slime or the like from their skin. My mom also thinks tarantulas are really pretty.

I always wanted a pet snake or monitor lizard growing up, but living in the boonies in Alaska (without electricity for quite a number of years) meant that we couldn't guarantee proper temp control. And those kinds of pets are expensive and we were dirt poor.

A physicist associate of mine is into lizards and once posted a pic of him holding a huge monitor lizard that he owns. I haven't been into reptiles for a long time, but I still thought it was very cool

Have you thought of making a career out of your interest in animals and nature? Lots of possibilities, depending on your areas of interest.

I tend to mainly follow science and tech online. A lot of my online friends are engineers, biologists, physicists, and nanotechnology researchers. We spend a lot of time discussing future technology, the future of humanity, transhumanism, post-humanism, and related topics.

I'm not really into anime, games, or cards, but I'm a huge SF fan, along with some fantasy. When I was little (8 or 9) my mom read me The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings books. Arthur C. Clarke was the first SF I read (probably around age 9 or so) and I haven't stopped since. I've been subscribed to Analog for 30yrs or more and my friends all know to get me Amazon gift cards for Xmas,birthdays, etc. I also own most of the Dresden Files books as well as the Nightside series.

When I'm not reading, I spend time with the friends mentioned above discussing science, tech, the future, and doing SF worldbuilding.

I'm not sure if I qualify as a geek or a nerd

Growing up, you could go out on a clear winters night and see a ton of stars and constellations. If you were lucky you might also see a major aurora display. On a night with a full moon, you wouldn't see many stars, but you could literally read, it was so bright between the moon and the light reflecting off the snow.

Of course, all that said, this was in the winter in Alaska. So if you stayed out too long, you'd freeze your ass off.:eek:

When I was in college in Arizona, the Resident Assistant on our dorm wing took a bunch of us out into the high desert on a moonless night with a big Celestron telescope (he was an Astronomy and Physics major). I got to see the rings of Saturn and Jupiter and three of the big moons (!)

I'm happy to hear about that side of you

I'd bet there are other people on EC who might also be interested, at least in some of the same things you are. Or they have interests that might not match yours, but go well beyond reality shows or singers. I know that there are or were quite a few amateur photographers around here at one time. People cook, paint, sing, play instruments, and do all kinds of other things if you look around.

Todd

 

Yes And no. Yes because usually it's because they feel the need to be special too when lgbt people are people like everyone else. No because some Straight people have legitimately been thru some shit.

 

In the same right, I am not proud that I was born straight-I'm proud of my journey through a long, emotionally-straining questioning period that eventually led to my realizing that i'm straight. I would have been just as proud to discover that I was gay or bi or pan or anything else, but the fact is I was straight. I had told my friends that I was questioning, and telling them that I had reached a conclusion about my sexuality felt REALLY good (I actually cried when I realized). It's not as much of a struggle as some of the LGBTQ+ questioning stories, but it's MY story. My questioning phase and my end result of straightness contributed to who I am today, and I would not be able to say that I'm an ally without it. I'm proud to be a straight supporter of the movement that you are a part of. So yes, I'm proud to be straight, and I don't think that's anything to hide or be ashamed of. I also don't think it's anything to hold an effing pride parade about, but I'm not ashamed of it. (!)