Recently I've been getting a lot of panic attacks, and it has to do with the guy I had extremely strong feelings for (you know, it's quite distinctive from all the other guys/girls you had feelings for). The fact that he's with someone else is what started my panic attacks. I have bad anxiety so I know it has something to do with it, but even a thought of him will drive me insane, and last week my panic attack was so severe that I felt like throwing up. I felt so dizzy and started sweating so much. It usually starts off as something in my chest area. It's certainly not a tight feeling similar to a heart attack, but it's so hard to explain that the moment I realize it's happening, the feeling comes from the chest area. And I know for a fact that I care way too much about what people think (introvert problems). Anyone have advice for "not giving a shit at all about what people think"?
I have only ever had one panic attack in my life and it was terrible. I just lay on my bed for hours shaking uncontrollably while feeling frantic and terrified. So, I can't even imagine going through this multiple times. I am truly sorry that you are experiencing this, and my heart goes out to you. (*hug*) I have always struggled with not only caring what others think, but being terrified of what they might think. It can be debilitating. People tend to assume that because I'm stubborn and outspoken on behalf of others, that I am confident. I am in fact very self-conscious. Personally, I found that the things I am afraid others think about me, are negative things I think about myself. I am afraid that others don't find me attractive because I don't feel attractive. I am afraid that people think I am awkward because I feel awkward a lot of the time. It's much easier to laugh about what someone thinks of you when it's something you're confident about. So, in my opinion, I think that answer to not caring what people think is to be secure and happy with who you are. Which is way easier said than done. I had the great pleasure of knowing someone who was not only exuberant about who he was, but lived as though anyone who had an issue with it didn't exist. He didn't ignore because he thought he was perfect, but because he would rather spend time with people that didn't care that he wasn't perfect. There is no easy way to stop caring what others think. You can resolve to not react to negative people, to not let them change how you live your life, but the emotional act of feeling hurt is harder to stop. My best advice is to try to live your life so that you're happy with yourself. In the end, that's the only person that matters. Sorry if this was rambling / unhelpful. I feel like I took a detour and got philosophical in the middle, and now I'm not sure that anything I wrote made sense.
I know how that feels : ( Usually, when I'm in a bad mood and feel I can possibly get triggered, I keep this box in front of me which consists of what makes me happy and feel my self worth. A few things in there -letters from my best friend when I was depressed -a good drawing, which many complimented -medal for winning a talent show Small memories that will prevent me from getting the panic attack. Also, normally, music works for me. Creative outlets seem to work. Do you have an interest in art/music/writing or anything? It would help to do it when you think you're going to be triggered. Also, meditating works too... I hope you're feeling better an get them less often ---------- Post added 9th Jun 2015 at 05:16 PM ---------- For self esteem, that takes time. It sounds stupid, some things don't work as well as others depending on person, but this is what I did: -kept a written record of every nice thing someone had sent to me -said nice things to myself in the mirror -talked to people about it... ...I dunno. Hope that helped
When I get bad panic attacks I breath in for 7 and out 11. This prevents hyperventilating. After that I start making origami lucky stars. It's fairly easy to do, and having something to do with my hands helps keep my mind off what triggered it. I write wishes in the stars for fun and keep them in a jar.
Panic Attacks? Those are horrible. Tight feeling in your chest. Difficulty breathing properly. Cold sweats. Shaking/trembling. Nauseous. Vertigo. Tunnel vision. Temporary blindness. Impaired hearing. Ringing in ears. Vomiting. Loss of consciousness. When it happens to me I have to lay down on my side, close my eyes, and work on my breathing (normally someone's there to help me with this and keep me awake) When I'm alone I often just pass out after one. Which I'm told is not good. Music also helps as it diverts my attention away from the cause of the attack.
One of the most powerful tools for working with panic attacks is a mindfulness practice. I've had a few advisees over the years who would sometimes have panic attacks when we were discussing difficult issues. The first thing I tell them is to stop and pay attention to, and take control of their breathing. Usually they feel like they can't breathe, and simply bringing attention to breath, making a conscious effort to take deep, long, slow breaths very rapidly starts to bring the panic attack under control. There's a reason for this: Our fight-or-flight response is directly wired to our respiration. So when we feel anxious, our breathing changes. But the feedback loop works in both directions... so when we change our breathing, it sends the message that we are calming down, and starts the process of secreting the neurotransmitters that help to calm us. If you make a more formal practice of mindfulness meditation, you can gain much better control over the panic attacks and help to prevent them entirely from coming on, as well as being able to arrest them almost immediately when they do. Jon Kabat-Zinn has done some of the best research on this and has several books out. By the way, there have also been several studies that have compared mindfulness meditation practice to the use of anti-anxiety drugs and found that for the majority of the people in the studies, mindfulness actually worked better than the drugs. Of course, this isn't the case for everyone, and I'd advise working with a professional rather than just trying this on your own, especially if you're already on medication. But it's something to think about.
I have severe social anxiety, in which case it's understandable how anxiety is a pain in the butt. Generally, I never notice I'm panicking because I get into this form of tunnel vision where I just repeat the same thing in my mind "I need to get out." Ultimately, if someone tells me I'm breathing faster or that I'm really tense, I can force myself to even out. In terms of the guy and trying not to care? I've always applied a method to my life; If there are people who no longer fit into my life because they've decided to not participate, cut them out of the picture. I won't ignore them, but I sure as hell won't let their existence plague me. When you see him/when you're thinking about other people's thoughts, just remember that most of the time, individuals don't really care because they're either going through the process of worrying about what other people think as well, or their opinion is just venomous in which case you should remain fierce and walk away from them. Try to never address negativity, and if you must, then address it with either a neutral tone or a happy, joyful tone. I find when people try to hurt you, being nice or neutral in their face can almost deter them and throw them off. But, never take crap you don't need to take. Value yourself because when you let someone else appraise you, that's when you're in trouble. Lots of love!
if it is debilitating there are recognised ways out of the horrors of anxiety through targeted therapies, short term meds if you need to sort it quicker .. or mindfulness practices as Chip says don't suffer alone … get some professional advice
