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Emotional Abuse?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by lillyandryan, May 17, 2015.

  1. lillyandryan

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    My mother has been insulting me and my brother for minor things like asking how to do something again. She screams at me When i Start to cry while she tells us what we did wrong. She multiple times threatened to hit me or "beat me until I have a teason'. She never hit me or my brother. We still love her because she is really loving other times. Is this emotional abuse , if so do You have any advice? Im only 15,and my brother 13.
     
  2. doc

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    Hi, this is a form of abuse and there may be a school counsellor who could help you. If you feel that your mother loves you and, at other times, is a much better behaved mother - then maybe she has some issues, that are nothing to do with you, that she is dealing with. Can you have a quiet , non-threatening, non-blaming conversation with her some time? Getting her to see how you are feeling away from the tension of the moment might help.
     
  3. banana1

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    can you talk to your father about that?
    I had the same issues :/
    moved to boarding school and after that into an appartment for that reason
     
  4. lillyandryan

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    ABout having a non threatening conversation, I dont think that would work bc I myself get too scared and cant talk and so. I will try to talk to her or s/o at my school tho.
    About my Father , he is my step dad he raised me but she is kind of abusing him too i think and idk he wont say a bad word about her even if its just the truth.
     
  5. OnTheHighway

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    I had a similar type of parent. I am much older now and have some perspective. As you stated you might not be able to talk to her and you might feel as if your step dad lets her do it to him as well, however, as another poster suggesting, going to a school counselor is a good place to start. As well, eve though your step dad may not do anything about it, if he is subject to the same emotional outbursts, you may consider talking to him and ask him how he handles it without being judgemental about your mom.

    My father and I spoke frequently when I was growing up and it helped tremendously.

    To this day, I remember the discussions we had about it while driving in his car in the pouring rain, both of us resigned to it, but happy to get it off our chests and talk.
     
  6. Michael

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    Well, she's got anger issues. In my book this is not nice, but it's not abuse 'cause it's not intentional.
    maybe you could go to her when she is calm and talk about it.
    Usually this kind of people doesn't mean intentionally to hurt, but if you let it pass, they will carry on. It requires a great amount of patience from your side. She might try to defend herself with a 'you need to be ready for the cruel world', but later (if she belongs to the angry type, which I suspect) she'll apologize. You need to be very patient with her until you reach that point. Very.

    Emotional abuse to me is being manipulative, using tears to try to change your mind and saying stuff like 'if you carry on doing xyz or being xyz you'll ruin your life'. Also emotional blackmail like 'you are destroying our family'.

    My mother belonged to the maniulative kind, while my father had anger issues 'cause he felt trapped on a loveless marriage with an emotiinally sick person. My father remarried later and his anger issues were gone, while my mother never changed her ways.
     
    #6 Michael, May 30, 2015
    Last edited by a moderator: May 30, 2015
  7. CuteZhemn

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    Kinda can understand. Being mom isint exactly easy.. Also when you have issues going on. Some people dont know how to do correctly. And even small thing can tricker her anger. Its not okay behavior. But i dont think its intentional. Its hard but dont forget she loves you both. I hope she gets it all alright. My mother didnt and eventually left us. I dont think yours will do same. Cheer up!