i recently began therapy and right away told my therapist I was bisexual. My sexuality is one of other issues I am there about. I am confused....I do not really know what to expect or where to go in therapy with my sexuality. Any ideas or suggestions would be appreciated.
I'm not clear on what the issue is. You told your therapist you are bisexual...are they making recommendations for what to read or think about? Requests for what to talk about? Did you make it clear that processing your sexuality is a major priority of therapy for you? In general, what it is, exactly, that you'd like to get from therapy?
I think a good therapist just lets you talk - they are there to provide a space for you. Sometimes just letting a stream of thoughts is helpful.
^ This. For one, what you say and how you say it (whatever it is) will tell the therapist what problems arise, even when you don't expect them, and subsequently, the solutions. That's what the therapist is supposed to do. At the same time, you're opening up about these kind of things. So it's a win-win.
I agree with LooseMoose - sometimes just letting it all go is helpful. The therapist can help you process things, but they cannot do it for you - therapy is an active endeavor. The change sought in therapy comes from within, not externally to you - I have personal experience with this. If your therapist is offering you advice, or giving you specific courses of action that you should take, then I view that as a huge red flag. You haven't mentioned that, but it seems to be sort of what you're expecting from therapy. Any good therapist will stay away from that, and instead let you come to your own decisions in your own time. They'll definitely be there for support along the way, and perhaps assist you in seeing things that you might not have before. However, explicit problem solving is not what they're there for.
Beginnings of therapy often come down to "tell me what brought you here today", or "what do you want to accomplish through this process"... and then sometimes followed by the most awkward silence. And that's ok, because a good therapist is not made uncomfortable by silence. It's not smalltalk at some social event where there's expectation of a constant flow of superficial topics. A few things for you to consider while "off the clock", the fact you're bisexual in itself is not a problem or a conflict or a source of stress. Are you looking for help in accepting it? In expressing it? In dealing with existing relationships that will change once you do? In dealing with comments/attitudes towards non-hetero people that hurt you in the past? Think about that and bring it to the next session. You can also make notes as things come to you, and bring those notes to the next session. It's not homework or a board presentation, so even seemingly scattered words can be a good starting point for discussion with your therapist.
