Outed to Homophobic Christian Teacher

There can only be one response: defiance.

If or when they talk to you (and I would refuse to meet with them anyway), look them straight in the eye, don't look anywhere else, stare right into their eyes until they are uncomfortable. Sit up straight (so to speak), stand with confidence and accept no compromises.

If what they are saying is unacceptable, get up slowly and walk away. They have no valid reason to keep you there.

No one will destroy your self-confidence without your permission. Do NOT grant it to them!

 

Good, then during that meeting, smile and nod, sit and stand proudly and ignore everything they say to you. If you really need to stay there, then tell them what they want to hear and lay low until you graduate.

It is especially important that you not go in there with a cloud of shame over you, sit up straight, look them in the eye, acquiesce if you must, but I will repeat: they can only break your confidence if you let them.

 

There is a difference between hearing and listening. If they feel they need to talk to you about this, or to try to change you, you can treat their words like a rustling of the wind, or a hug letting out a loud fart. Just noise, nothing to pay much attention to or to worry about. When you have a choice where you can study, who you can associate with, and especially who you can trust, you will finally have the freedom to really be yourself. Don't let this hurt your confidence; rather, just see it as an opportunity to learn how to deal with difficult and perhaps dangerous people (dangerous in the sense that they can really mess up your life). The struggle for equal rights for us is certainly not over. You can be proud that you are a part of that struggle, a leader in the struggle. And that should give you some real confidence.

 

Wow, I'm very sorry about that

Like others have said, face her with defiance. If she approaches you about it, be polite and stay composed, but still be aggressive. Tell her how this was not a choice, and how offensive you take it that she thinks it is wrong.

Hope this helps

 

You can remain composed, polite and gentlemen. There's no need to get kicked out school for an attitude. But remember this: you have logic, reason, and science on your side. You have facts. Use numbers, data, and evidence. As a gay person, you're not an abomination, you're not a serial killer, and you're one of God's creatures.

State you're case: you're an honorable, decent person who treats other with respect and believes in fairness. So what if you happen to love people of the same gender?

Quite frankly if it is a Christian school, then I would quote Jesus. After all, did he not say to love everyone? To stand up for the most troubled of people? The only thing that matters in Christianity is believing in Jesus and what he taught, and not 2 sentences in the Jewish Bible.

So, yeah, keep a level head on your shoulders, keep cool, and always resort back to facts and reason. Don't yell, or be a smartass, but stand your ground. Let your teacher know how much having him on your side would mean for you and others students who stand silent and can't express the same thing (read: who aren't out).

 

Excellent advice thus far I think.
They'll no doubt make you feel guilty of sin, remember to not let that diminish your confidence!

 

Whatever happens don't let your teacher knock your confidence. You are who you are and there is nothing wrong with that

 

Be true to who you are!
Being polite, reasonable and logical with them will help. However, unfortunately with very religious people reality and logic are completely lost on them.
They will try make you feel wrong and that you are a bad person. If they tell you it's a choice and you can change, they are wrong you can't change, I know I've tried (therapy and all)
Remember no matter what you are a good person and anyone that tries to make you feel otherwise is just plane evil.
You have friends on this site, we are here if you need support.

 

If you're in school and worried about the consequences, then my advice is to get ready for the negativity and the things she may say. You can know inside that doesn't change what what you know about yourself. Then go in with your head up and roll with it.

 

I would recommend assertiveness rather than defiance. I.e. Don't attack the other person verbally, no matter how dumb their views or words may be, but just defend your right to be who you are, explain calmly why you disagree, stay totally unflappable, and insist on being treated with respect. Defiance lowers yourself to the other person's level, assertiveness maintains yourself on a higher level and is more effective.

As for your self-confidence, that should be under your control, it should not be determined by other people, especially not those with bigoted views. Focus on personal development and expanding your life experiences and challenges outside your comfort zone, this will boost your self esteem and let you shrug off unfair criticism much more easily.

Finally, prepare yourself for the worst, mentally visualise it happening, and imagine yourself handling it calmly and with dignity and poise. When you are prepared for the worst case, the reality will be easier to deal with.

 

Do your parents know your gay and are they ok with it? If so you may want to talk to them before meeting with the teacher so you can let them know what's going on and have their help with a game plan. With or without your parents you might want to plan a response if you are given some sort of ultimatum by the school. If you patents don't know you might want to consider talking to them begore the school does