Hey guys, Chase here. I don't know if you guys know of the Eastern Orthodox church, but I've been a Christian since I was five... It's a super strict faith, and well... what my church doesn't realize is I am transgender, and dating a girl... I made a comment on the article I'll post below, and I decided to post it on Facebook also... where a lot of my fellow church members can see it. No regrets right? I'm scared. :help: 'Evangelicals and Catholics Together' Denounce 'Threat' of Same-Sex Marriage | Advocate.com
What did you say? They may be able to see it, but it's possible it may also get lost in their feed. And, there's always the possibility that some of your church members are LGBT+ friendly too. Either way, I really hope you do not have a negative backlash. ):
I'll copy and paste what I said- If same-sex marriage was only a parody of "true marriage" then why do you feel threatened by it? I am angry at my own church's view on LGBT matters, but to be able to outwardly declare such hate?! This is the same as outwardly being racist. I hope one day, despite me and my churches contrary beliefs, that not only will same-sex couples be allowed to married, but it'll be normal for transgender people to go into the restroom they feel comfortable in! I know I might get in trouble for saying this, but I'd rather be hung then lie and say there's something wrong with having a gender identity or sexual orientation that's not the norm! ...My church is not LGBT+ friendly. Sure, we won't say you're going to Hell, but my church calls it a sin, they so they need to so they avoid "secularism". My church will always see me as female, so I'll probably have to leave one day... It's sad because I really love my church besides that one thing!
You said it right, and that was really brave of you, mate. And, well, yeah, but you're apart of the church too. If you're LGBT+ friendly, maybe someone else is. Maybe not, but, hey, possibility's still there, right? Really sorry your church is anti-LGBT+. I can't really say much else, except that I hope you stay safe and that you will not receive hate for speaking out about your beliefs.
Thank you. I just think I will be kicked out once they realize I refuse confessing homosexuality as a sin. I don't want to be kicked out, but I need to be me... I just posted in the coming out place if you want to see the situation maybe just a little better... I know there are homosexuals in the church, but they see it as a sin and constantly go to confession to try to control it... I cannot be celibate like them, and I cannot let the church come in between whoever I date, as I am even dating a girl I love right now...
Ah, I see. That's a pretty rough situation you're in. Nonetheless, I'm real sorry you have to deal with this, but you're doing a very respectable thing. So, kudos for that. Again, I hope it works out well.
Thanks! I'm still nervous though! I don't want to lose my church, but I guess if somebody's going to hold you back it's better to cut ties quickly... it's hard to though.
Great comment! you're well on your way to an authentic life! trust the Spirit that is clearly at work in you!
First, relax... try to keep yourself a bit busy, do some things you like, and do some exercises, have a walk... so to build down stress hormones. take a few deep breaths What you say is up to you, you know them best... you could make small notes and think about what you want to say... You could have a look here: When things I would say being tg is biological... it has to do with brain development before birth... its really your identity, not just a whim... you could even show the brochure... its for the british national healt service, a very reputable source... so its basically nobodys fault, but this is how you are... that you even have a disphoria being perceived female... and to lead a happy life and be a constructive member of society you need to be perceived as male... you could say you will be like your male twin brother... your gender is only part of you, you will still be the same... and that transgender (and gay) people have been around in all cultures... there are ca 700 thousand tg people in the us (according to a survey of 2011)... so its many people... they are covered with positive pictures more and more in the media... Basically there would be two ways to go: being defensive, and putting up a fight if necessary... your article goes in that direction a bit, citing hate etc... Its possible it changes some attitudes, but it stirs some emotions. the other way would be to remain neutral, and pointing out shortcomings and stating facts and ones own points... not getting angry, just saying how you perceive things. Point is if people are confronted with anger, they might react with anger. If you say, look, this is my position and what you say is not coming from a position of love, they might react differently. I know the second one is not easy. Advantage is it avoids aggravation emotions, on your side also. You could just remain calm and say your part. You identify as male, dating a girl is a straight relationship. Anyways you could say its about two people in love. You're not fooling around, you're having a loving partnership. Or at least you try to. There is nothing wrong with that. I'd say just remain calm... say it how it is... and see how they react... You might ask them for a talk, maybe on a calm day... when you feel you are ready... or you could wait until they want to talk to you, and prepare what you want to say meanwhile. I'd say just remain relaxed and picture a good outcome hugs
Thanks Jay! Wow, you actually gave me advice that's NOT just "Have a look here: [insert link for book for children here]" Lol, sorry to tease you but don't deny whenever you give me advice usually you do that . Still, it's good advice, so thank you... My church is against homosexuality, but I am not really homosexual, however, they're also against transgenders... >.< Sigh. I'll tell him when we have our private meeting together.
*laughs* In my opinion the biological explanation for being transgender is a good one. Its nobodys fault, and it says its not a whim. This has been known for quite some time now, there are parts of the brain different in sizes in women and men. So its legit. And people know this, this is how they feel. There simply should be different stages to this, thats why there is a tg spectrum. I also like the comparison to a male/female twin. The links usually lead to other links, or to information that can be given a bit of thought. This for example is advice to try to build some transgender support, in any way... like joining a GSA, looking for support groups, or even starting one, etc... You could try to read it through with an open eye, sometimes an idea flashes up... And you could have some kind of small notebook with you, writing down ideas when they come up, and think about them later. Sometimes when we think of something completely different, parts of our mind are still busy pondering things, and bring up an idea... especially artists are known to write this down immediately, and writers. hugs
