How Easily Do You Forgive?

Ugh way way way too easy. I've given people far more chances than they deserve

 

Basically this is me too, although it's something I've been working on. A lot of times, I won't even bother letting the person know they've hurt me and will forgive them anyways. My dad actually calls this one of my biggest flaws. Now I at least try to say "hey that's not cool" before saying "it's fine, I forgive you", sometimes I even let them apologize first.

 

I can overlook a lot of shit to keep the air of civility. No one's really done me wrong enough personally for me to not consider most things as water under the bridge. The few people who I will hate to the grave are the ones who fucked over friends of mine. I will never forgive them. Would sooner look the other way if they'd fallen onto the tracks of an oncoming subway train, only problem being I wouldn't get to see the result or the delicious terror in their eyes. But you'd really have to go above and beyond to earn my hatred and become unforgivable.

 

I forgive--pretty much always. When someone mistreats me I think it is bad enough that it should affect me momentarily I don't see the point of allowing it to affect me forever.

 

I definitely don't forget. But me giving any sort of forgiveness is really relative to the situation and what was done. Sometimes it also depends on who it is sometimes.

 

It definitely depends on what it is and it depends on how remorseful they are.

 

It depends on what the offense is and how penitent one is.

 

If it's a great offense, then I don't forgive. People may seem to regret some of these offenses but maybe it's just an act to avoid repercussions.

 

No matter how deeply hurt I am, I will forgive. Always.

 

Never. The only reason I had written a letter to my Mum telling her I forgive her for outing me is so that I could bring peace to myself. The fact that she threw it back in my face exacerbated my bitterness.

 

If it's a one time thing I will not hold it against them I just forgive and forget. But if it's the norm for them I just cross the person from my list. Sorry I'm not a door mat.

 

Too easily at face value when it's important. Silently and internally I brood about it for a while and bring it up again afterwards if I am truly offended by something. I've just always been the type to bottle it up and protect the other person, even if they've done something I don't like. When it is someone important, I can usually truly forgive easily. Especially when they didn't mean it and I know they didn't. It can still sting, but it doesn't mean I don't forgive.

I forgive, but unfortunately I never forget. I'm an elephant like that.

 

Extremely hard for me to forgive. Once you hurt or wrong me I will never be the same with you again even if I talk and smile towards you there's always that thought in the back of my head that you fucked up.

In fact the only thing I regret is not telling more people to fuck off sooner.

 

Overall I forgive more than I would like; depending on how badly some one has hurt me though/how close they were to me I may or may not have no problem completely shutting them out.

I AM willing to accept someone's apology though as long as I feel they genuinely mean it and see that they have actually learned something from the incident.

 

I like to forgive easily because there is nothing worse (for me) than holding on to bitterness. I find it more emotionally exhausting to be at odds with people, even if they have wronged me. I have certainly forgiven people against the advice of others and on balance I think it was the right thing to do. That's not to say I have always forgiven though.

 

I forgive very Easily, but it would also depend on the situation.

 

I don't think it's wise to ever forget anything, or disregard any information when making decisions. At the same time, though, it's not wise to dwell on the past. Violence and vindication tend to go hand-in-hand, so I try to avoid actively seeking retribution. My ultimate revenge on everyone that has wronged me in the past is that I continue to try to understand the world, and make it a better place. I would never actively seek these people out, but if my worst enemy had nowhere to sleep, I would make space for him.

I haven't always been at peace, though. It's a long and violent struggle, but it gets easier every day. I find I'm a lot more productive now that I'm not dwelling on my past.

 

Understood ... however, I think it's a wash.

The bitterness feels just about as bad as having forgiven only to have that person, or people, do the same shenanigans again ... or over and over.

The end result is that, whether a person doesn't forgive or does forgive, they will still hurt and what happened becomes an indelible part of one's psyche. Everyone here, regardless of age, gender, or location, based on having read so many posts, remembers some of the worst trespasses on them very clearly.

 

I forget but don't forgive.
It's hard. Whenever I think about an old situation (some of them at least), I get re-pissed all over again, even if it happened years ago. Especially adults. I just hate the fact that I have to do what adults tell me to do, but they don't have to do what I tell them, and if I dislike any of it then I have some "attitude problem".