Hi everybody, this is my first post.....Anyway I am a bio female who was raised heavily gendered. Always wanted to be female, until recently. Actually looking back I had a few moments in childhood when I seriously asked myself what's it like being male or thinking my face could pass as male. In some rare pictures from nerd day I am seen wearing a tie, but it wasn't until recently I started my own tie collection and now I am seen wearing a tie once every two weeks. I remember the first time I put on my own tie I said, "ahhhhhh...This feels natural." Mum immediately cut me off. I'm very dysphoric about my chest and bum. I have extremely short hair and I despise most feminine things on me, really wish I had more masculine clothing and binders. Now due to complex rationales, heavy thinking, expectations, and social media I have no desire to be female or male. But why is it that I like he/him pronouns? (They/them works too) Or that one day I wish to be called handsome, prince, ect? Am I a very masculine agender? Queergender? Bi gender? Demiboy? Anything else i don't know....? Would I be considered trans**, trans meaning transitioning into the right body~ neutral, or just neurotis, or are they the same thing?? Sorry if this is long or confusing, I'm just as confused. I think it might be effecting my health too. I have a much smaller apatite, more headaches, panicking easier, and at any random time I can't stay still..... I have to start walking or if in an environment that that would seem inappropriate I start rocking back and forth. The length of them verys from a few minutes to close to an hour. :help:
You might have a look here: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/gende...9807-figuring-out-my-gender-identity-s.html#4 Its a lot of information... I'd say take your time... ask if you have further questions... people will try to support you... You might play a bit with hairstyle and clothing style... sweaters one or two sizes bigger, unisex or mens jeans, etc... what you feel comfortable with... there are threads on clothing for ftm... it can be really fun... You might also for example talk to a gender therapist, a counselor from school or someone from an lgbt center, if that's what you want... saying you want some counseling... I would do things I'm comfortable with, don't feel pressured to do something... its your decision... There is no only one right way to do this. Its your choice what you want to do... You might look for support groups, maybe in your local lgbt center... and build some community on EC, for now you can chat with others via wall messages, after 14 days you can apply for full membership and join the chat and send private messages... http://emptyclosets.com/forum/gender-identity-expression/164130-other-trans-friends.html (*hug*)
Hey, welcome to EC, first off! You seem to be focusing a lot on finding a specific label, I wouldn't worry about it that much. Just go with what feels right or rightish for now. (In my case, I choose gq because of the ambiguity of it.) You can take your time to find the right word or way to explain it to people, but the important part is being yourself.
Hi there, I just want to echo the welcome to the EC forums! You sound (understandably) confused, and this is a great place to throw around ideas, get opinions, post pictures if you're so inclined, without judgement or anyone forcing you to be anything. You are the only one can decide for yourself who you are and don't let anyone let you think otherwise. Whether you're trans, bi-gendered, agendered, or anything else, that's for you, and your identity is valid. Everyone else has said this, but take your time. There's no rush to figuring who you are...most people with an ounce of self awareness can take years or decades to figure out who they are...
The first time I wore a tie... Give it time. Maybe seek therapy; if your mom doesn't want you to get gender counseling, seek it for general anxiety, and explain to the therapist why you're anxious. As for chest and butt, wearing your pants slung lower than women wear them minimizes butt and hips, especially if they're a little baggy. There's not much to do for chest: double sports bras and layers really helps. I like accessories so I'll throw on a light gender-neutral scarf sometimes; it covers my chest so I feel less exposed and I don't have to look down and see it (and in fact was doing this long before I started questioning my gender).
