Xmas disphoria

I'm game for that (high five)

 

Same here I was having a great day that was beofre my dad gave me a present from my gran which quess what was girly bracelets hated it so much whay made it even worse was my parents were so nice giving me a shirt and Kayaking stuff that nade me feel good then that just put a downer on the day for me plus my mum got me a card saying daughter and its like I don't think o am and I now shed be fine with it but dont have the guts sucks right

 

Totally! It's all part of this gender normativism where certain things are "girly" and certain things are "manly", and if a man does a "girly" thing then he's being girly, or vice versa... rather than realising that these traits aren't related to gender, they're just traits that some humans share with other humans.

 

My family haven't accepted that I'm a trans guy. I give away stuff that I dislike. I disposed of the cards that got my name wrong. I appreciate their kindness, but I refuse to stress myself out. I've got bigger fish to fry. I'm not being difficult because I want to. It isn't a crime to be happy. I want them to understand that.

I know this isn't easy, but try to see it from the other person's perspective (maybe you've already tried!), unless they really are being jerks. For example, my mother is sensitive (especially at this time of the year with SAD) and she can't handle 'losing' me. My dad is more of a realist. He tries to avoid using gender pronouns. The trying is the main thing.

I've mostly learned to manage dysphoria. I freely admit that I break down and cry sometimes. And I'm usually tough as nails. So don't beat yourself up if you think it's overly dramatic and/or weak to get upset over this. This damn thing feels like my tragic character flaw.

 

I got lucky this year. Only clothes were one polo shirt, a kilt, and a pair of plaid pajama pants.

 

As far as clothes go, I got a Super Mario Bros. shirt and new socks this year (good for me since the dryer eats all of mine). So nothing overtly "girly" this year, which I'm happy about. I don't know if my godmother knows about me being queer or not, even though she lives across the street from us.

I take it my cousins, aunt and uncle know since they addressed me by AJ on a Christmas card...but idk.

 

your aunt may just not know how to handle it. but look at it as an opportunity to educate. you can let her know that you really appreciate her thoughtfulness, but you just don't wear girl pajamas. and then ask if it could be exchanged, or otherwise if it could be given to someone else. kind of an education thing for mom too, like "no, mom, I am not showing cleavage. you know that is not who I am and I will not live a lie." I write these words thinking that they can be said with love and understanding, so I don't mean it in a harsh confrontational way; but perhaps in a gentler confrontational way (because if you don't confront it some way, it will just not change) (&&&)

 

(*hug*)

There are bags for socks and small clothing... for dryers and for washing machines.

 

I probably should mention that the kilt would have been bought anyway, it's sorta expected for performances...

 

I'll report back in tomorrow.

Also my mom just said sit next to your son. It irritated me.

 

I got pretty masculine clothes from my parents, they're slowly easing into it. That's good.

My grandparents on the other hand, necklaces, bracelets, handbags, perfume etc.. They're fully aware of everything that's happening with me, my parents communicate with them a lot. I don't even look like someone who wears jewellery or carries around a handbag. Days worsen as I await my binder, too...

 

Cash, sweet non gendered dead presidents.

No stupid gendered clothing. The day my mom buys me a dress or shoes is the day I'll die a happy girl.

And yes, I told my mom to look up what my little message said.

It was the transgender flag for a Christmas tag. Let's see how this plays out. I am going to send that email though now the holidays are over. It's me time now, done sparing their feelings at the expense of my own.

 

maybe there is someone who would appreciate jewelry, perfume and a purse. No sense it going to waste. and nothings says "you don't get it, gramps" than giving away those inappropriate gifts. :eusa_doh:

 

I'm not out or anything, but I got mostly boys' clothes (minus one grandmother I told "no girls things' afterward). But then I got to have the disheartening conversation with my parents in which my mother said Laverne Cox used to be a man and the only thing that defined man and woman were parts.

 

You're right. I regifted them to my cousin and she greatly appreciates them. :3