Small Victories

I just had my blood drawn (to get hrt) which I was nervous about. It was no biggie at all. Apparently I'm not scared of needles or blood. So self injecting T should be no problemo!

Still no shot though. I'm at the clinic as we speak, so we'll see.

 

way to go Patrick.(!) you got this man.

 

Yesterday I thought of an idea: I'm going to make and publicize a petition to the Hong Kong government to push for a change in rape laws to make them gender-neutral (i.e, so that rape isn't just classified as a male-on-female offense). I have the full support of my parents on this and I'm going to start doing research and finding out more about Hong Kong's rape laws and how I'd go about sending this petition.

This issue, along with other issues in men's rights, has been bothering me for a while now and even if this petition is declined or doesn't go towards changing legislation, I think this is an issue that genuinely needs more awareness and any advocacy is good advocacy.

Also yesterday was the first time in 4 weeks that I've gone an entire day without self-harming. I think it's because I feel like I have more of a purpose in the world now.

 

yesterday I met with the manager for my office and I am now (again) the chief Fire Marshall/Safety Coordinator for my building. lots of responsibility, but I've done been doing it for the past 10 years (this is a re-appointment) and im told im pretty good at it.

small victory in my professional life.

 

I got my binder today (sooner than expected), flattens the chest quite well after seeing before-and-after shots so that's really good, can't wait to wear it out. Had to take it off though, didn't want to do more than 30 minutes on the first day. Do you think I need to wash it before I wear it again?

 

I wash mine like once a week. I should probably do it more than that but washing them too much wears them out which is especially bad if you only have one. You definitely don't need to wash them every day, and make sure you air dry.

 

I think my mom got it. Hug me folks! She compared me to guys my age. I kept on explaining her that for soooo looong. It pays off, even if you don't see the effect at first.

---------- Post added 22nd Sep 2016 at 04:04 PM ----------

I think she really meant it this time.

 

I was towling off after a shower and stopped to notice my shoulders. I felt for the first time, proud of some part of my body. I've been working so damn hard for several months to gain muscle and finally starting to notice real progress.

 

For some reason I thought that my first shot appointment was on October 10th, but I just realized it's actually October 4th. So it's a lot sooner than I thought!

 

And I got called sir twice today, which I don't get much. One of them didn't even correct himself. The other one did and called me "young lady" like five times after. Come on.

 

Some people are afraid to "get infected by gender", if they call you right. Sorry for them ._.

 

I never understood that. If you're unsure of someone's gender, shouldn't you calm down on the gendered terms, not increase usage up to 11?

 

I got my first binder today and can I just say..

SO FREAKING HAPPY

 

Since I got my new haircut I can pass like 80% of the time if not even more(!).
And one off my friends told me that I would make a handsome guy (I am not out at all but hey it´s a great compliment anyway ^^).

 

My victories are as follows:

This forum made me realise I am the overruling authority on knowledge about sports supplements. I took 5 minutes out to assess that and I am back with confidence that my knowledge cannot be matched or questioned. Hooray for me.
My GIC referral form was finally submitted by my GP, now I play the waiting game.
A friend has saved my name as Kal in her phone and refers to me as 'he' when talking about me. Plus she thinks I'm attractive so I don't feel like I'm going to be alone forever.
I've realised that nobody actually cares that I'm trans - in a good way. I haven't had any bad reactions at all. In fact, I feel stronger than ever. The biggest hurdle will be my mum and her parents, and the fact I haven't spoken to her in 3 weeks isn't good but that's a bridge I have to cross. The fact she's left me to it is a bit disappointing but to be honest, i think I've finally figured her out and my general disappointment at not having a parent that is overwhelmingly supportive and loving is starting to disperse. I'm never going to have a parent that is excited to see me or actively seeks my individual company. So I just have to get on with it.
I've also ordered some new underwear, boxers, for my holiday with my brother. We're sharing a room so he's bound to see my in my pants and I'd rather they be masculine. Beginning to see myself physically as a bloke day by day and getting excited that one day, everyone will call me Kal and being a hairy, deep voiced man will be my truth.

I am stronger than anyone and can cope with anything. No one can match my resolve and noone's opinion matters more than mine.

 

met with the gender Dr on Friday and I'm going to get my base blood work done this week. still meeting with the therapist regarding my gender and transitioning. she's helping alleviate my fears regarding the social end of things regarding acceptance etc. and im feeling pretty good.

add to that I was heading out the highway and stopped at a gas station to pee and there was a line up for the men's room...... the ladies was free so I went there in a crowded store and walked out with my head high and feeling pretty darn good about myself.

the only down this weekend was that my son is having reservations in that he thinks he's going to loose his dad, after having his mother check out mentally and socially that's hard on him, I told him that if it was that hard on him that he was crying at the table I would stop but he said no it would make him feel worst if he felt that he was keeping me from being my whole self. now I don't know what the heck to do, he is the last person in the world I want to hurt.

 

I came out to a guy who's in marching band with me.

He asked whether or not to call me my birth name or Romeo. I told him Romeo is my preferred name. He politely asked why that is, and so I just went ahead and told him I'm trans. He took the news incredibly well, he's super supportive and I can tell that he has my back. He actually went up to me at lunch and hugged me, and offered to bring me some cupcakes on my birthday next week. It was really nice.

I might come out to my Color Guard team this Friday at our team hang out. Hopefully that goes well too.

 

Although my boss at my night job (who is a cute straight girl about my age) sometimes calls me missy, which is very annoying, but in general she treats me like a dude. She has ordered me to kill a bug for her and always makes me move heavy boxes and take out trash even if there are other dudes around.

 

You go, man. Glad to see positive news.