Small Victories

On Thursday, my family and I were at the Faire, and we were passing by one particular stall ("spin to win" a free cruise type thing), and I was the only one of us to look over there to see where exactly it was to, but then I quickly lost interest. However, I heard the stall guy from behind me say, "It isn't too late for you, ma'am."

I started laughing because I thought he was talking to my mom, and his choice of words were kind of... not right for my current family situation, so irony.

But then I realized I was the only one of us who actually looked over there, and I'm pretty sure he looked towards me when he said that. And then I nearly failed to contain a very loud squeal. x3

 

I apparently pass pretty well in public, albeit unintentionally (well, intentionally, despite the fact that I'm not out).

Earlier today I was at a conference, and pretty much everyone that saw me thought I was male or referred to me as such, unless they were corrected.

I was carrying my baby bro, and a lady came up and was talking to the baby, "Awwwww, are you with big brother today? Is brother carrying you? Yeah... I bet you like being carried around by brother." This was awesome.


Then a bit of a more embarrassing moment: I went to the ladies restroom (as I usually have to do, in case my family saw me going in the men's, they'd flip out). A woman came in and stopped suddenly as I was washing my hands, she said, "Uh... Is this the ladies room?" *accusatory voice*

I just said, "Yup." That was awkward...

Then my mom was telling my how someone had seen me, and thought I was her son, and how she corrected them and told them I was her daughter. It's kind of weird though, since I so obviously look like a boy to everyone else.

So yeah, three blatant passing moments in one day! And I wasn't even trying.

 

*knew you were male

 

Have to admit that this post made me smile a little.

 

I'm now friends with the only other transgender person in my town and we're both super excited to know we're not alone. They strongly think I'm transgender and I'm starting to accept this abit more. Maybe I'll stop doubting it and denying it soon.

He's ftm and I'm mtf (most likely). I met them awhile back but were just now becoming friends and it's honestly amazing that there in my life.
Sorry if this isn't much of a victory, but it's really imporant to me and i felt like sharing haha.

 

I went out with my friends last night and we got talking about gender and sexuality and I got to explain my own gender and sexuality and I got to say things like "I'm the shortest boy" and buying 'guy' clothes and getting my hair cut (on Monday... hopefully) and they just accepted it and agreed with me and can't wait to see my hair and ahhhh... it's just so cool to have them as friends that I don't even care that I might have broken my ankle.

Next: I tell them my name.

 

me too.

 

Thats a big victory:icon_bigg

 

that is a very cool victory, having a real life friend who not only gets it but is going through similar things is a real boone. Happy for you.:icon_bigg

 

Another small victory is that a female friend of mine said i act like a girl. She wasn't being mean but she meant it. :icon_redf

 

big victory today, got a call from the gender clinic today.
25 September i can start with the psychological part of the therapy and 28 October i start the medical part!!!!
Finally i can go further upon the road

 

THATS AWESOME!!! I'm so happy for you! It must be very exciting!!!

 

excellent. (!)

 

well, i was at my counselor's on tuesday. and we talked about me be my Fem self for those 5 days the other week and how i want to present as fem at least some times in various ways. and about my fears if i do, it's down right dangerous to be trans sometimes. she said maybe i dont need to be "her" all the time as i dont display a lot of dysphoria (barely any at all TBH) and how it's a journey and i can't rush things. it was very emotional but cathartic at the same time, i felt drained but better when i left. she said the maybe i can find a place to be fem in my life and maybe the could be enough for now.

she also said she has the ball rolling for me to see a Gender Therapist, but it's gonna take a few months. but she said I am doing really well with my gender(s) and dealing with "the world".

sorry to be so rambling....

 

I'm not really sure how much of a victory this is, but here goes... today my nan said that she didn't know anything about gender, sex and sexuality, she thought gender and sex (genetalia) were the same thing and you could only be straight or gay. But that she's learning so much because of me. She said it's okay that I "want to be a boy" and that I can be whoever I want to be.

She ruined it a little, though, by adding at the end, "but you'll always be my girl."

 

I've gone about...3, 4 days now without getting hung up and obsessing over gender things! It's about damn time. It's nice to be more or less back in that place where I realise there doesn't have to be conflict between the varying facets of my gender identity - there is as much place for "and" as there is for "or". It's funny how I managed to forget there is no obligation for me to specify my gender or restrict myself to one pronoun set or name on a permanent basis.

It's nice to realise that. I've been trying to push myself down into a label for so long, and I realise now that I'd much rather give the long-winded explanation than try to squish it all into one word.

Also, praise be to the sports bra. I honestly feel like I can attribute a good part of this betterness to realising I have an option for when I can't bind (either for comfort reasons or clothing reasons) and when wearing a regular bra would leave me excessively conscious of my chest. I can't believe it's taken this long for me to put two and two together to find the happy medium between binding and not binding!

 

well, that's a hugh step for an older person. and as she learns her perspective may change, what's important is that she seems to say that she will always love you.(*hug*)

 

this was and is an awesome idea.(*hug*)