Small Victories

I met someone in real life for the first time today and they immediately called me by my preferred name! (I'm kind of nervous though, because they did it in front of my mom who still doesn't know that I want to go by this name)

 

I painted my nails a few days ago and today I was in public and no one seemed to notice. Kinda nervise about working with painted nails though. xD

 

Yesterday I put on some makeup for like the second time and actually went out in it. (to the local LGBT center, but meh.)

Eh, some of it wasn't my thing.

But some of it was nice. I think if I got one of my friends to teach me instead of my older mom (sorry mom, love you ;3) it would look better.

Also, my chest is starting to feel kinda tenderish, and I've been on hormones for about a month and a half (two months in a few more days)... so yay for boobs?

 

I actually managed to take a bath today. I was showering and stuff but then I thought "screw you, dysphoria" and poured up water.

Dysphoria kind of won though, I was still self-conscious and got up quickly.

I just wanted to put something here lol, even if it's a very minuscule victory indeed.

 

I was a little down lately, thinking i would never pass. I got called mister(or refered as a male) two times yesterday at job. I wasen't even wearing a binder (i'm not out to my boss) It was awesome and i was a little sad/annoyed when the person started to say sorry and call me Mme =(

 

My therapist is working on a letter to support top surgery and while it's not done yet, I got to look at it with him and make a few suggestions. Plus my psychiatrist said he would sign it too if the surgeon or insurance company want that. This really might happen!

 

My sister called me "she" by reflex yesterday

My father was like (about me) "there's a new toothbrush for him if he wants to use it" and she was like "no she's already got one"

 

I wad going to post here again talking about how my chest is starting to feel tender/sore, and that I think I'm starting to see boobs...

But then I realized I already said that.

Way to go, me. ._.

So instead, I'll say that after reading the journals I wrote for The Catcher in the Rye (die in a ditch, Holden), in which I came put to my English teacher because I knew I'd have him for a teacher next year and thought I should tell at least one teacher, he apparently ended up going to my guidance counselor with tears in his eyes and said that he wanted me as a student next year no matter what.

So... yeah. ._.

I kinda thought he suspected it a bit, since he commented on the day of the final exam that my hair looked nice (eh), and afterwards we talked about a movie he thought I should see, where the main female character is the shy nerdy type.

I'm the shy nerdy type. ._.

 

I have come to the point where crossdressing is no longer crossdressing. I feel free when I wear my tights and dresses during the day wile I'm at home. Boys cloths feel so weird to me now, and I hopefully won't be getting any more socks or boxers in my Christmas stocking. I only wear boys cloths because I have to when im in public.

I am also looking forward to meeting with a councler at my collage to see if I can start transtioning. All in good time.

 

:icon_bigg i don't know why but i got a chuckle out of this.

 

I came out to a co-worker today and he was supper supportive. He's the first person I've come out to at work.

 

My brother holds the door for me and says "ladies first" and it makes me want to hug him <3

 

My FreeToM order just left Philadelphia and is on the way. The expected date is the 6th, but I hope it gets here sooner

 

I'm trying to type up my first resume (f*ck you, occupations!), and my dad walked in and didn't really ask if I needed help, but just was like, "Oh, but you might want to do this and this, and maybe this..."

But, one of the jobs is a welcomer/greeter, and he said, "Well, if you're applying to be a hostess, then put this..."

I'm just so glad he said the female equivalent of the much easier to say "host". :3

 

My general physician got me info for an endo in San Francisco. Why San Francisco? Because this endo knows his shit when it comes to trans people. Hormones may be a possibility and I may be able to figure out a solution when it comes to the other meds I have to take.

 

When me and my mom were leaving Costco today, the girl who checked our receipt said: "Have a nice weekend ladies!" which made me feel good. <3

 

Might not count as a victory for some, but I found a site selling gothic styled clothes for prices that don't bankrupt you. I am in heaven. They even had white powder and foundation so I can turn my already pale complexion into that charming Morticia white shade.

 

i meant it in the best possible way. i chuckled because of the menu switch up not the gender part.(*hug*)