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Here, genderqueer and still working myself out...

Discussion in 'The Welcome Lounge' started by IvorySteel, Dec 9, 2014.

  1. IvorySteel

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    Hiya! I'm keep this short and sweet, as I wrote a long post detailing the history of my gender identity but the site logged me out and I lost it... basically, I'm Ollie, 22, and genderqueer. In which way exactly, I don't know. I'm biologically male, but always been attracted to the idea of being female. I've always wanted to dress feminine, and yesterday took a big step in buying my first female clothes (btw, wearing a cute new dress right now, and feeling rad as hell <3). But also, I am not uncomfortable presenting as or identifying as a guy. I am on the whole equally comfortable identifying with either gender, though which I prefer to present as can fluctuate (over the past week my desire to present female has intensified, which has led to me taking these steps).

    I am looking to establish my identity as I know I'd be more comfortable with a label, but haven't found one that fits me yet. Bigender/genderfluid have been the best ones I've found yet, but there's not much online about these identities. Any genderqueer people with similar feelings out there, I would love to talk to you. :slight_smile:

    So yeah, I'm Ollie. Don't mind he/him or she/her pronouns, ideally would prefer a mix of the two. Right now preferring "she" but that might change! Nice to meet y'all!
     
  2. Candace

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    Hello and welcome to EC! :smilewave :welcome: It's a pleasure to meet you :slight_smile:
     
  3. Hell2theno

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    Lovely to meet you!! Hope you settle in :slight_smile: welcome!!
     
  4. Hexagon

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    Welcome to EC :slight_smile: You'll find a lot of people here in a similar position to you here. Hope you figure things out.
     
  5. wolf of fire

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    Hello and welcome to EC, feel free to message me if you need help with anything or want to chat.
     
  6. ctrl alt delete

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    Hey Ollie! I'm also a genderqueer individual. It's great to meet you! you sound like your a pretty interesting gender non conformer. Try not to get too hung up on the labels! I think everyone finds them confusing when you start. :icon_redf I found some talks on youtube pretty helpful when I started out. Welcome to EC (*hug*) we're all super nice here (&&&)
     
  7. DinelodiiGitli

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    Hi and welcome to EC. I sure many here can relate to how you feel and I'm sure you'll make friends as well. Blessings, best wishes and I hope all goes well. (*hug*)
     
  8. MindvsHeart

    MindvsHeart Guest

    Hello there! Welcome to EC and the Non-binary journey~ I'm Genderqueer myself so I get how things are constantly changing so I usually stuck to five things during my GQ journey:

    1. Take it slow and easy, be sure to read whatever's out there so that you can get your own comprehensive idea of who you are, not who others think.
    2. Labels are there for you if you want to use them but customise away- who knows 'you' better than yourself?
    3. If things get really overwhelming, be sure to take a break and let all the things you've learned to sink in. Take a break, and then go back into it when you're ready.
    4. You are free to change your mind whenever and change how you identify yourself. When I first started my journey, I identified as transgender only but as I researched and talked to people, the non-binary identities really stood out to me such as genderqueer so I identify as a genderqueer transguy. If it changes, don't fret.
    5. Enjoy the process :slight_smile: make it fun and not monotonous y'know?

    Wish you the best!
    -MvH
     
  9. confuzzled82

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    Hi Ollie, Welcome to EC. You'll find many that aren't always comfortable with what they are "supposed to be". Be yourself.
     
  10. Fafner

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    Hi! Great to meet you (!)
     
  11. YuriBunny

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    Hello~! ^.^
     
  12. Clancularius

    Clancularius Guest

    Hi, it's nice to meet you.
     
  13. Hi Ollie :smilewave and welcome to EC !!!
    (I also joined the site about a week ago)
     
  14. lb41974

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    Greetings !! I hope that you enjoy your stay :slight_smile:
     
  15. happydavid

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  16. IvorySteel

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    Thanks everyone for the welcomes, so nice. :3

    Hiya, it's good to meet other GQ peeps. :smilewave

    Cheers for the advice. Especially the part about customising my identity. I like Bigender as a label, I think it describes me quite well, but reading things I've found my experience differs quite a lot from other bigender folk.