What is Unforgivable to You?

Nothing, ever, is overlooked. Nothing, ever, is unforgive*able*.

Everything that happens is taken in, and informs my sense of reality. Sometimes a thing occurs that would appear unforgiveable...but with more information becomes understandable.

That is very different from saying that everything is forgiven. Sometimes more information never comes...or sufficient information for forgiveness never arrives. And I imagine that sometimes, sufficient information for forgiveness doesn't exist.

But if you close your heart to another because of an infraction of theirs...that is your infraction; and the graver one.

 

Abuse of children. In any way, shape, or form.

 

This:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u3zfr04gLi0



In seriousness:

Forgiveness and misdeeds are very subjective so I'll stick with the most extreme. Rape is one, along with other forms of sexual assault.

Betrayal of trust in various forms, not so much milder stuff but those who for their own pleasure abuse a child, animal, disabled person in their care, any person or creature that has no choice but to trust them.

 

I won't mention the obvious unforgivable stuff in too much detail, as most of you have covered it (pedos, murderers, rapists, etc...)

Here's my list:
- If my family hates you for a legitimate reason (let's pretend that my sexuality is not an issue to my family for a second): If you piss my family off, it's over. Relationships come and go, friends come and go...but family is forever. Especially if you piss off my Sister or Mom.
- Infidelity. I won't hate a person for cheating (unless they are just a massive whore), because the way I see it (in most cases), if either partner has to cheat then it's not meant to be. I'd end the relationship without even thinking twice (marriage is a different story, but only because I'd have to think it over instead of making quick decisions on separating)
- Insulting my religion, ethnicity, culture etc...: I shouldn't have to list this, but I know certain people who are minorities and date a-holes who hate minorities. It's just mind-boggling. If you have a problem with my Judaism, my Jewishness and my support for Israel...get out of my life.

 

I am not a forgiving type so let's not dwell into details, shall we? *taps on his little black book*

 

Oh, forgot to answer the forgiveness part.

I used to be really clamped up and never forgave anyone. However, that has changed. I am much more willing to forgive now but that doesn't mean I trust that person anymore.

People use each other in the real world all the time and while I do value Loyalty, I do realize that people make questionable decisions under duress or stress. That's usually when people hurt other people.

There is a limit though, there are some people I will never forgive. People with no sense of loyalty at all will never get the time of day from me.

 

You know sometimes.. I just wanna slap a bitch.

[YOUTUBE]m45eJHul_gM[/YOUTUBE]

Sorry I just had to.. That dogs hilarious.

 

What if they keep making these infractions over and over and over, never changing? At the very least, you need to stay away from such people. If these infractions keep happening, then the other person never really apologized in the first place. That's how I see this one. Forgiveness requires that a person expends some energy, either actively or passively, either to rectify the wrong(s) or never do it/them again.

 

I did not say that forgiveness should be given automatically or lightly. I said that one's heart should never be closed. One should never be closed to the *possibility* of forgiveness.

Of course if the forgiven person transgresses again, the bar is raised for future forgiveness. I completely agree with you that forgiveness requires an expenditure of energy (not simply words) on the part of the forgiven.

If that energy is never spent, forgiveness won't/shouldn't happen...but that doesn't mean it wasn't *possible* that forgiveness could occur...it just didn't.

 

In terms of the sort of person I am when it comes to forgiveness, I think I tend to be too quick with it. When someone apologizes for something, it takes courage and vulnerability and I really respect that. I'm ruled almost entirely by my emotions, so the empathetic part of me sees the gesture of apology as enough to warrant instant forgiveness. Now, that's not to say that I don't sometimes feel a bit hesitant about giving someone another chance. I just try to give them the benefit of the doubt.

The only act that I feel is truly unforgivable is:

- Homicide: In other words, intentional murder. People who murder others by accident cannot be held completely responsible because they didn't mean to kill anyone.

 

I have afew things that I think are unforgivable... They are:

Threats - They are unforgivable because if someone can threaten you once, they can do it again and you should never be pressured into doing something.

Betrayal/Trust - If you trust someone with something close to your heart and they spread it or lie about it or something it really is unforgivable because you opened yourself up and they used it against you.

People that deliberately use something against you that they know has had an impact on your life, basically low bows that are out of order.

I mean it all depends on the context though.

 

Abuse of children and animals
Rape
Betrayal

 

Two things you don't fuck with. Family and love.
If you mess with someones heart... that is unforgiveable.
Messing with someones family is just the same.

 

This. Sometimes people kill others because they were driven to it and just lost control. For example someone could have been abusing them for a long time and then finally one day things get to heated and they hurt them. Maybe they didn't even mean for them to die. They make that one mistake in their lives, and I don't think it necessarily means they have to be a bad person. On the other hand, there is no such thing as being driven to rape somebody. There is no such thing as justified rape. If you do it you are a horrible person and deserve to spend the rest of your life in jail. If I believed in the death penalty, that would be one of the only things it should be applied to.

Also on my list would be anyone who hurts a child in some way. There is never an excuse for that.