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What are you thinking?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by LD579, Nov 30, 2014.

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  1. Kaiser

    Kaiser Guest

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    Depends where the fight takes place.

    Pennywise, practically, controls reality, while Freddy, practically, controls dreams. They exist on a plane that is separate but the same, like a wall with two sides.

    And yes, I've had this debate before. And yes, I know, it reveals me to be a super dork. And yes, I am totally fine with that.
     
  2. Young Blood

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  3. justjade

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    Finally got an appointment with a clinical psychologist. The receptionist asked me the reason I was calling, and I told her it's clinical depression and anxiety. I didn't mention being transgender because that's not the reason I need a shrink. It's just who I am. It's not something that's wrong with me.
     
  4. Browncoat

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    Why do people feel the need to send a thank you note thanking me for sending a thank you note?

    Shall I send them a thank you note thanking them for thanking me for sending them a thank you note, then?
     
  5. SiberianHusky

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    The perks of living on a farm... Doesn't get much better than this. :slight_smile:
     
  6. Romi

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    I have the absolute CUTEST babies. Oh my goodness. But when they go at it....they go at it. Crazy heads.
     
  7. QueerTransEnby

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    Trying to insert funny meme here, fail...
     
  8. Miles16

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    [​IMG]

    chainsawsuit - three panels daily » thanks again
     
  9. QueerTransEnby

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  10. DeviantAttitude

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    My friends dad is in the hospital. He has cancer. My mom told me he is one of the few friends that she made when we moved here. She says he is a special person.
    I've met the man. I wish I knew him better.

    Its not the first time a friend of mine's parent dies, but the other case was a heart attack out of no where. This one is diferent....

    I have a test tomorrow. I need time. Im sad for her and for my friend, even though we dont talk that much to each other :frowning2:
     
  11. TigerInATophat

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    Had an elaborate dream in which Michelle Gomez played the character that was both my nemesis and unconsummated lover. For anyone who doesn't know who that is, she's the lady currently gracing the avatar of EC Admin Martin. When I see her I have this weird sort of not-quite-a-crush-but-damn-your-attitude-is-sexy thing for her.
     
  12. Kaiser

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    I'm not sure how I should feel after this testing-the-waters exchange, with my mother, other than utterly exhausted but, strangely, motivated.

    Basically, I told her, in Psychology class we discussed the topic of being transgender. In reality we did not; but I wanted to test her reaction/expressions. Upon saying the word 'transgender', her eyes did that little dimming flicker, something she does when not wanting to be open to the idea/topic/discussion.

    Strike 1. But, I still have 2 strikes left, so, I went a little further...

    I asked her what she thought about transgenderism; even threw in a tidbit about, next time class meets, we'd be giving our input on the topic, and I wanted some feedback. Simply put, I feigned ignorance, hoping she would bite, and try to "influence" my infantile opinion, with her honest stance.

    "I think it's weird, and I'm thankful nobody is like that in the family."​

    Strike 2. But, I still have 1 strike left, so I went for the coup de grâce...

    I asked her, what she'd do, if [insert a few random cousin names here] turned out to be like that. Again, that dim flickering in the eyes, momentary silence, and then:

    "They'd be causing problems for everybody, with that crazy talk."​

    Not quite done, I decided to bring it a little closer to home. I asked, how would she handle it if [insert my sister's name here] was transgender. And my mother responds with:

    "I couldn't handle it. I'd be a failure, and I'm already feeling like that because of the... [insert drug-using and neglecting my sister and I mini-rant here]... I need my kids to be normal."​

    I agree, having gotten what I needed, a.k.a. Strike 3.




    I was correct in believing, something like that would decimate her. That she couldn't handle such a thing, because it would rock her world and shatter her illusion of self-imposed comfort. Despite being clean with heavy drugs for several years now, it is quite obvious to see, one shake up and she'd go back to that, to forget about her worries and to cope with what she can't forget.

    Normally, I'd be tempted to proceed forward, but I know how this would play out. I tell my mother, she cracks under the realization, turns to the drugs, everybody notices her changed demeanor, they probe to find out, they find out -- it's my fault, and they'd gladly let me know it too. I know, I should do what is best for me, but what is best for me is to keep waiting, because I don't have the funds I'd need to do what I need.

    I won't get the support I need from my family, so telling them would leave me without support -- but with the addition of, they know, and they think odd/less of me. I'm going to have to, pretty much, accumulate the finances, find a place, and move/leave without alerting them, because so long as they know my whereabouts, I will not be able to live as a transitioning woman. So, for the time being, I need the pieces to remain where they are, and how they are.

    Sometimes, I get tired of living my life like it were a giant Chess board. However, this is precisely why I have the social prowess I do, because I have to win -- or else, I will have little to nothing.


    Your move, Life...
     
  13. Yosia

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    What is so wrong with being cold?

    It makes things easier to handle, there is no sugar coating in whatever you tell people which leaves less room for confusion, the people who care about me stay - whereas the people who don't care about me don't stay. And there's a difference between being 'cold' and being a dick. I prefer not to associate myself as the latter as I am still a very caring and loving person, I am just more straight to the point compared to most, why does that even make me 'cold'? I just don't understand what society expects of me any more, if I'm kind then I am 'fake', if I am passive then I am 'rude' and if I am assertive then I am 'creepy', like what the fuck society?

    I have had enough of people telling me how to live, so it's not going to happen anymore, this is my life and my choices. As is reflected in my signature.

    Rant over. ^.^
     
  14. Martin

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    [​IMG]
     
  15. TigerInATophat

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    (*hug*)

    I know you're probably used to your mother disappointing you by now, and having to deal with stuff on your own, but still not nice. One would hope for at least a glimmer of non-selfish indication of support.

    EC family loves you to pieces as you are! :slight_smile:
     
  16. Romi

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    You will, however, get it from us.
     
  17. TigerInATophat

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    *swoons*
     
  18. CyberScream

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    Might compose a song. I have some ideas. But I want to compose a song.
     
  19. MisterTinkles

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    Im tired.......................tired of it all.
     
  20. NingyoBroken

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    So, I'm changing my name from Aki to Masaya. I just feel like it fits me more.

    ---------- Post added 29th Jan 2015 at 12:21 PM ----------

    Look, whatever they say, do what makes you happy. I personally would be miserable living as the wrong gender, especially for as long as you have.
    So, fuck what they say and transition because at the end, you only have this life, and you should be happy while your still living it.
     
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